Tomboy At Heart
by LoudAutomata16
Summary: When Lana is forced to take a vacation from her job as Bobbie Fletcher's mechanic, she decides to crash with Lincoln and spend some close time together, leading to them getting closer than either of them expected.
1. Chapter 1

Lincoln raised his wrist to check the time on his ticking watch again. The hour hand was on the 'V' while the minute hand was slowly drifting towards the top of the watch. It was almost five o'clock, which only meant one thing.

She was late.

Lincoln shrugged. He supposed it wasn't entirely her fault. She was coming by train, and seeing how she wasn't the conductor, she was just as much a victim of the ever infamous train delays as he was. However, it was her fault because she was the one who insisted on getting a train ticket instead of something more convenient, like a plane, or a car. Sure, the distance would be really long in a car, but her excuse of '_I just always wanted to ride on the train, Lincoln. Trust me, it'll be quick,' _was repeating in his mind, and it was starting to annoy him.

"Even after all these years, I'm still suffering because of my sisters' mistakes," the young man sighed. "And my phone battery just had to die on the way over here. Just my luck."

"Stop bellyaching, kid," an older voice snapped at him. Lincoln turned his head slightly to an angry-looking, skinny man with a black soul patch sitting next to him on the bench. "Let me to you something, kid, you got it easy. You're just waiting here for some girly that loves you and you're whining about your phone? I'm here waiting for the train so I can hop from state to state 'til I get back to New York, get some work there and be away from my fiance. Don't piss and whine in front of me, kid, and start being grateful."

"First off, don't call me 'kid'. I'm twenty three years old. Second… eh, I guess you're right. Sorry to hear about your family."

The New Yorker waved his hand dismissively. "Got nothing to be sorry for. You're not the guy who sent all the good jobs out of the Midwest. Just sucks, you know? Saying goodbye to the people you love."

Lincoln did know. Growing up in a large family meant a lot of goodbyes, and each was more heartbreaking than the last. They did manage to stay in touch, but there was a palpable difference between his present reality of talking to his sisters on a computer and his past memories of dodging their toys in the hall and wrestling them for the remote. He smiled sadly, as waves of nostalgia hit him. How he missed those old days…

"Well, I guess that's why I'm sitting here and waiting for her to get off the train," he muttered to himself.

He was pulled out of his momentary slump when he heard the loud sound of the train approaching, and his eyes lifted and his smile glowed brighter as the train began to pull into the station, hissing smoke and gas into the air. It took a few moments for the train to fully dock, and Lincoln stood up from the uncomfortable bench and watched with alert eyes as the passengers began to flood out. His eyes darted from tired face to tired face, searching for the one he was here for, until he noticed a red cap in the distance, sitting on top of a mat of blonde hair.

"La-LANA! LANA!" he cried into the crowd. He noticed the cap turn in his direction, and begin to move towards him. It disappeared for a moment, dipping under the heavy crowd, until Lincoln felt himself get knocked off his feet as a laughing young woman pounced at him and tackled him to the ground.

"Hey, Lincoln! Good to see you again!"

"How are you not tired after squatting on a train for hours?" he coughed out in response.

She looked much different than the last time he saw her. Her blonde hair was slightly darker and dirtier than he remembered it, and she wore it in a single long ponytail now. Her teeth were finally grown in, and the two rows of white, uncracked teeth he saw in her smile made him feel ashamed to have a chipped tooth at the front of his mouth. But other than that, Lana was much the same. She still wore a pair of overalls over her dark bluish-green clothes, still had a light dirt stain that marred her otherwise clean (and adorable) face, and no matter what style she gave her hair, a large red hat always sat over it.

Yep, she was Lana alright.

"I don't know. Guess I just got a lot of natural energy," she said as she got off the ground and extended her hand to help her brother up. The white haired youth accepted it, and lifted himself with a groan. "I mean, just because it's my break from work doesn't mean I should become a couch potato."

"That's exactly what it means to me," Lincoln chuckled as he and Lana hugged each other. When they broke the hug, Lincoln asked "So where's your stuff? I can help carry it to the car if you want."

"Oh, you have a car?"

"Well, not really. It's Clyde's car. He's letting me borrow it for a little while since he's on his honeymoon with his Russian mail order bride… wait, you didn't answer my question. Where's your suitcase?"

"Relax. I just left it over there," Lana pointed to a small red suitcase left unattended by a pillar.

Now, Lincoln wasn't really the biggest worrywart around, but even his jaw dropped when he saw that. "Lana, you know you can't leave your luggage alone!" he hissed at her. "Someone could've slipped in drugs or a bomb or..."

"Linc, it's Royal Woods. Who would do that around here?"

"I don't… you know what? Forget it. Let me just take it from here..."

"You don't have to. I'm not a helpless little girl, I can carry my own things."

"Don't turn this into a sexism thing. I'm your older brother, you've been sitting on a train for a long while, and offering to take someone else's bag is a common courtesy. So… do you mind?"

Lana rolled her eyes with a scoffing smile. "Sure, whatever you want, Prince Charmless."

"Bet you wish I was a fairy tale prince," Lincoln grunted as he started carrying her heavy luggage, cursing its lack of wheels mentally. "That way I'd be a frog half the time."

"I think you mean that's why _you _would want to be a frog. Because then you'd have an actual reason for me to kiss you," Lana retorted.

"I see you've still retained some good ole-fashioned Loud House comebacks."

"Lynn and Lola were my mentors in that field. _Namaste._"

The steamy smell of the train station followed them as they walked away and reached the parking lot. Row after row of trucks and cars and motorbikes filled their eyes, and Lincoln started walking ahead of Lana. She followed him to a Toyota Prius, a green car in both color and environmental impact.

_Guess Clyde and his folks haven't changed much, since they're still doing this eco-stuff._

"Sorry it's not as impressive as the race cars you work with now," Lincoln chuckled as he reached into his pocket for the keys. His hand squirmed around in there for a while, before he finally pulled out a jingling key chain and pressing a button that opened the car. Lana slid into the passenger seat while Lincoln stuffed the suitcase into the backseat, slamming the door and groaning a little. He then got into the driver's seat, started the engine, and began driving on the road home.

"Hey, if it's alright with you, can we get some dinner before you take me to your place? I didn't really have any lunch," Lana smacked her growling stomach to emphasize the point.

"There's food at my place. We got noodles and cereal," Lincoln offered.

"Aw, come on, Linc. Let's have something at the Burpin' Burger, for old time's sake."

Lincoln shivered at the name. He used to love that place, before Clyde's dads introduced him to a wave of anti-fast food documentaries that left him with a powerful fear of gaining even a slight bit of weight, and an even more powerful guilt over the genocide of trillions of chickens and cows every year. However, the one thing more powerful than either of those induced feelings was the puppy-dog stare of Lana as she begged him with widened blue eyes to take her to the restaurant that started it all… the place where she got everyone stuck, met Bobbie Fletcher, and found a guaranteed career as Bobbie's repairwoman.

Lincoln relented. "Okay, fine. We'll pick up some chicken nuggets."

"Chicken nuggets? I'm not six anymore, Lincoln."

"I didn't say they were for you. The nuggets are for me," Lincoln scowled. "You can get whatever burger you want."

"Can I get a meal combo?"

"Sure, but no onion rings. Don't want that smell wafting in the car."

"Deal," Lana grinned, her mouth already watering at the prospect of warm fast food.

Lincoln drove up to the nearest Burpin' Burger and placed their respective orders. When he reached the window, he took their food and placed it on Lana's lap. It warmed her, which was welcome in the cool fall season. As Lana scrambled to grab her burger from inside the bag, Lincoln drove back on to the street and began asking her about life.

"So, Lana, how have things been with Bobbie Fletcher? I'm sure you're the superstar of the repair team, right?"

Lana nodded, answering in a voice muffled by bits of meat and ketchup which were slowly dripping down from her mouth. She stopped and swallowed, and Lincoln watched as her throat bulged in order to allow all that meat to slide down. She wiped her mouth with her sleeve, and tried again. "Yeah, things are great. To be completely honest, I'm still surprised the offer was open at the end of high school, and I'm pretty glad it was. Wasn't doing all that well with grades, as you remember..."

"Yeah, I remember. When you were sixteen, you dropped out, and you've been working with her for the last two years."

"Best two years of my life," Lana sighed, before a look of sadness quickly replaced it. "Well, maybe not exactly. I miss you guys, honestly. Kinda sad that we all had to move on and we only see each other at Thanksgiving."

"Well, everyone's got to go their own ways eventually. I mean, unless you're Hispanic or Arab. Then you can just have four generations living in the same house."

"You mean like Ronnie Anne? Your girlfriend~?"

Lincoln blushed, and stared ahead with a look of annoyance. "She wasn't my girlfriend, okay? Just a friend. I mean… it would've been nice, but careers and college and you know how that story goes."

"So if she wasn't your girlfriend, who's the lucky lady? You can't honestly expect me to believe someone as good looking as you doesn't have a gal pal," Lana teased, poking him with her elbow playfully.

"Well, that's the truth," he shrugged. "I guess I did date Stella for a few months last year, but we broke up."

"Oh," Lana said, putting her arm down. "Sorry to hear that."

"Don't worry about it. I've gotten over it by now. But I honestly haven't been thinking about getting a girlfriend lately. More focused on my last year of college. Of course, it wouldn't be my last year if I didn't take that gap year."

"Oh yeah, I forgot you took one of those."

Lincoln grinned at her. "I pretended to Mom and Dad that it was to help me 'discover' myself, but the only thing I discovered was how many hours I could stay awake playing video games before my eyes dried up."

The brother and sister continued talking until they finally reached Lincoln's place. When Lincoln started pulling up in the driveway, Lana's eyes widened. She had expected him to be living in some small, crappy apartment. But no, he was living in a genuine house, complete with both front and back yards, and they were both neatly trimmed. "If you're wondering, I live here with Clyde," Lincoln explained. "His dads help pay for it, and the rest is covered by the money we make."

"You guys have jobs?"

"Clyde works at a fancy restaurant that tips pretty well most of the time, and I take some online art commissions. You'd be surprised how well people pay to see their self-inserts and their OCs going out on dates together."

Going out on dates was, of course, a polite way of saying 'banging each other's brains out.' It wasn't like Lana could tell, though. She didn't even know what the hell an 'OC' was.

But it wasn't important. The two reached down and unbuckled their seat belts, and Lana wrapped her fingers around the plastic bag and carried it out of the car, watching as her older brother struggled to pull out her hefty suitcase. Lana took a deep breath as she watched; she had forgotten how clean and cool the Royal Woods air was, and how easy it was to breathe, especially when compared to the smog and hot air of the racetrack. She felt calm, relaxing muscles she didn't even know were tensed until that moment.

_So this is why Bobbie forced me to go back home for break, _Lana realized. _It's just so… nice to be back in Royal Woods._

Her thoughts were interrupted when she noticed a glinting object get thrown in her direction. She caught it with her empty hand, and realized it was the key. "Yeah, Lana, you can just go ahead without me," Lincoln called to her as he started tugging angrily at the suitcase in the back. "I might be here a while."

"Are you sure you don't need my help?" Lana asked.

"No, I'm fine. You've had a long day, so feel free to lay on the couch and watch some Fletnix or something. Oh, and leave my food on the kitchen table, I'll get to it later."

"Alright, if you insist."

The young woman turned away from her brother and stepped up to the wooden porch. As she shoved the key into the keyhole, she noticed a few stray vines growing on the white wooden beams of the porch. Without caution, she reached up and stroked the vegetation, and felt bumps along it in patterns. "These must be flowers," Lana realized, before turning back and opening the door. As she stepped inside, she was hit in the face with a blast from the heating, and she glowered. "So much for good, cold air."

She did lighten up as she realized how the indoor climate was pleasantly warm, rather than the scorching hot like she was used to on Bobbie's race tour. The worst were Florida and Georgia. On the hottest days, it honestly felt like there was some giggling alien holding up a magnifying glass to scorch the puny humans like they scorched their ants. As Lana tossed Lincoln's dinner on the table and hopped on the couch, she remembered how much her armpits seemed to drip, and how one of the young men working with her on the team seemed to constantly reach down and tug on his crotch. "_It keeps sticking to my legs,"_ she heard him complain to another guy, who just laughed and nodded in agreement.

"Well, I don't have to worry about the heat for a while. It's fall in Royal Woods. The only place colder than here is the inside of an Eskimo's freezer. Let's see what's on the Fletnix," she decided.

There was some anime, but Lana wasn't a fuckin' weeb. There was a crime documentary about Ted Bundy, but Lana wasn't a psychopath trying to get tips on how to start her own murder career. There was a pretty good Fletnix original show, but Lana wasn't about to support the director. She knew he did… something bad, because his name was circulating in an online boycott. He must've done something to deserve. Racist comments, maybe?

"Nothing good to watch?" asked Lincoln as he suddenly appeared in the doorway, slurping on a Jumbo sized soda.

_Screw you, Clyde's health videos that make me feel bad. I know this is nothing but liquidated sugar, but I don't care. I'll drink what I want! You can't keep this from me!_

"Not really. Why do you have so much anime on your account? And the really pervy anime, to boot," she cringed at the winking image of a spider lady with giant breasts on the screen. Lincoln blushed lightly, and quickly reached over to snatch the remote from her hands and turn off the TV.

"Uh… all anime looks pervy. It's just a different art form. You just don't get it."

"Is that the show you draw self-inserts for?" Lana asked.

"No. Maybe. Depends if they'll pay. And even then, I'll say no. I don't like anime anymore. I left that stuff behind in high school. B-Because I was busy studying hard, like you should. I mean, you should have."

Lana bit down on her lip, trying not to laugh at her dorky brother trying, once again, to hide one of his more childish obsessions. "Alright, alright, I'll drop it. Just one question, Linc."

"What is it?"

"Do you… do you watch weeb shows in your underwear?" Lana asked. At this point, she couldn't hold it back anymore, and let herself burst out in hysterical laughter.

"I think I'm going to bed," Lincoln growled, leaving the young woman to clutch her stomach as she kept laughing at her own wit. He took one last glance at her before he left, and the sight of his younger sister laughing so hard forced a smile out of him, even though her laughter was at his expense.

It just felt good to have one of his sisters around again…

* * *

**I had been planning to write a Lanacoln story for a long time, but the perfect idea never really hit me. Then one day, I was talking with LoudRisque and he suggested this plot to me, and I just rolled with it. So sit back and buckle in, because next chapter is when things start to get _spicy..._**


	2. Chapter 2

**anonymous789: You know, the similarities between that story and this one didn't hit me until I got to the end of the last chapter haha. I promise this one'll be different.**

**Jeff: Never took you for a Lanacoln shipper, tbh. That's cool to hear, though. Lanacoln is one of my favorite Loudcest ships as well, and painfully underrated.**

**As for everyone else, thank you for your thoughts, both positive and negative. Now onto the story...**

* * *

The animal kingdom is a diverse one. The many animals of the world varied in size, shape, intelligence, color, appetite and ability, and people had differing opinions on which one they considered the best, or at least their favorite. However, there was one animal that was universally despised, by both man and beast. A disease-carrying, blood-sucking, ugly-looking flying failure of Mother Nature known as the mosquito. Lincoln was reminded why mosquitoes were the absolute worst when he awoke to the shrill sound of one buzzing around his ear. With a growl, he slapped the side of his face, hoping to kill it, but the bug swiftly flew away and Lincoln was left with the stinging pain of having just slapped himself.

"Great way to start the morning," he grumbled.

His mood did slightly improve when he reached for his phone to turn off the alarm he no longer needed. He scrolled through his notifications before checking his school email, and found out that his classes for the day were canceled. "And if my Friday classes are canceled, I just got a three-day weekend," he realized with a grin. "Cool. So now what do I do?"

He spied the mosquito from before hovering above his bed, waiting patiently for him to go back to sleep so it could vampirically suck his blood. Lincoln squinted menacingly at it, and in his imagination, the insect squinted back at him with its many eyes. "Well, I know what I'm going to do right now."

For the next half hour, Lincoln would be jumping from wall to wall trying to kill that thing. He probably lost more blood slamming into furniture and smacking himself than he would have if he had just let the mosquito drink from him.

Of course, in the end, he was successful. The bug was splattered on his wall. He left his room triumphantly, chest puffed with pride.

"Yo, good morning, Lincoln," Lana said, squatting in front of the bathroom door with a toolbox in her hands.

"Oh, uh… good morning to you too, Lana," Lincoln replied. In the heat of the moment, he had forgotten she was staying with him. "Did you sleep well last night?"

"The guest room was honestly a bit cramped, but nothing I could deal with," she shrugged nonchalantly.

"Yeah, I had to improvise a little. That's actually the closet. I had to stuff a bed in there, and didn't really have time to tidy up. Sorry about that."

"You're making me sleep in a converted linen closet? Are you sure you didn't do that as some sick form of payback?" Lana chuckled. "And that's nice. You know I'm not the kind of girl that's about to complain about a little dirt. Hell, it probably made the experience better. Plus, the bed was comfy and these PJs made it all worth it."

Lana still hadn't changed out of her sleeping attire, and Lincoln took a moment to stare at her clothes. The soft fabric hugged her body tightly, revealing every curve and nook Lana's womanly body had to offer. Her breasts stuck out, and Lincoln got the opportunity to see how… _round_ they became as she grew up. He glanced downwards at her bluish pajama pants, and noticed that they were hanging a bit loosely, but not loose enough that he couldn't make out the outline of the blooming flower lips in between her legs…

_Lincoln, stop staring. For fuck's sake, that's your sister._

His cheeks turned crimson and he looked away, his eyes falling upon the eggshell colored walls. "G-Glad you had a good night's sleep, Lans."

"Yeah. So what are you still doing here, college boy? Don't you have classes to get to?"

"Classes are canceled for the day, so I got my perfect three day weekend," Lincoln bragged with a smirk. Then he remembered the tools Lana was holding, and he turned back to her, still hunched in the doorway, and pointed at them. "Now it's my turn to ask what you're doing."

"Oh, this?" Lana lifted a wrench to her face. "I'm just fixing up the toilet."

"Is something wrong with it?"

"Not really. I mean, there are some problems, but nothing too threatening. I just… it's been a real long time since I could get back to my roots and do some plumbing work. I love fixing up race cars, and it's a real rush, but I have missed working with house pipes. You, uh, don't mind, right?" she asked, slightly worried he'd tell her to knock it off.

"You're fine. I mean, if there is even a tiny problem with the toilet, I'd want that fixed before it became a big problem. And there's no one I'd trust with that job more than you," Lincoln said with a smile.

"Thanks, Linc," Lana nodded, unconsciously fluttering her eyelids. Getting complimented by her older brother was a feeling she missed; it made her feel all warm and fuzzy and good inside. "I promise I'll do the best job I can with the can."

"I know you will. And maybe when you're done, I can make us both some eggs," Lincoln offered.

"That sounds awesome! You remember how I like mine, right?"

"Yep. Deviled eggs, just like you were a little devil back then."

"As if you were some kind of saint. You once tied up Lori, stole her whistle, and let the rest of us make the biggest mess we ever could. Don't tell me you've forgotten that."

"We were all dumb kids back then," Lincoln laughed lightly as he turned away from his younger sister to walk down the stairs. Lana took that as her cue to continue her work, so she put her monkey wrench back in the ruddy toolbox and reached for a pair of long nose pliers. She closed her grasp around the handle a few times, opening and closing it, and scowled when she realized how sticky it was. "This'll take longer than I thought," the blonde muttered.

Lincoln turned his head instinctively when he heard her say something, and he noticed that her back was turned to him, and her bubble butt was aimed at his direction. Her ass crack was visible over her pants, and Lincoln blushed again, shaking his head and he quickly turned and went down the stairs, with plans to make Lana breakfast like a good, wholesome family member would.

Because if she weren't a family member… that image of her from behind would've been a lot more tantalizing.

* * *

They ate their breakfast together, and Lincoln was once again reminded of Lana's gross taste when she dumped mayo, ranch and ketchup on her plate of eggs. He had always shared that disgusting taste in food with Lana; they were usually the only two that would look at food on the floor and ask "Is anyone going to eat that?" But still, he felt his sandwiches, as weird as they were, were a lot more palatable than Lana turning her plate into a mix of sauces and condiments with barely any room for the eggs themselves.

Whatever, it wasn't his concern. He simply ate his food, waited for her to finish, then took both of their plates to the kitchen while Lana got changed into her regular clothes and stepped outside for some fresh air. The porch was radiating with coldness, the morning dew seemingly absorbed into both the wood and the growth that wrapped itself around it. Lana once again touched the thin, green vines around the porch, and she noticed that the ingrown buds that had littered the vine were starting to open up slightly, revealing hints of a violet color. When Lincoln stepped outside to join her, Lana turned her head back to face him and pointed at the vine. "Hey, Linc, what is this stuff?"

"Those are… well, I don't know the exact name, but they're some small flowers that blossom only when the weather gets colder. At least, that's what Clyde told me," Lincoln said, rubbing the five o'clock shadow on his chin. "Evidently, when they actually finish and become flowers, you can pull out the stigma and suck some honey off it."

"The stigma?"

"It's that little yellow line inside the petals. Surprised you don't know that."

"Animals are my expertise. Reptiles especially," Lana clarified. "Flowers were more of a Lola thing. And Leni. And Lisa, when she was using them to make drug grenades."

"Damn, I remember that. Ended with the cops at our door and Lisa bursting out the window with her makeshift wings, screaming how they'll never get her alive… before she fell to the ground and we had to call an ambulance," Lincoln laughed lightly.

"I'll never understand how our family never became Royal Woods' Public Enemy Number One."

"Maybe the fact that Leni babysit for the mayor's kids helped out with that," Lincoln told her as he tried to step past her and get to his car. But Lana wouldn't budge, and she held out her arms to block his path, impish delight written on her features.

"And where do you think you're going?" the teen asked.

"Calm down, I'm just going to the store to pick up some things. Milk, juice… _ranch sauce_," he visibly shivered, "and some pancake mix for tomorrow. So do you mind moving?"

"Only if you promise to buy me something," Lana said as she moved her body to keep him from stepping past her. He tried to dodge her, but the fast life on the track must've trained her instincts, because she was able to block him more swiftly than Lynn could've ever dreamed of. Finally, he relented with a sigh, and Lana declared "I want some dog biscuits!"

"You don't even have a dog."

Lana grinned at her defeated brother. "I didn't say my dog wanted some dog biscuits, did I?"

She watched as he backed the vehicle out of the driveway, plunged it into the street and drove off with a loud screech. She felt a bit of admiration for her brother; instead of putting off his chores until later and playing video games, he opted to be responsible and buy only the necessities. He had always had a responsible streak to him, and Lana realized it had matured with him as he had grown.

_Just one of the things I love about him._

Her cheeks heated slightly with that thought, so Lana shook her head and turned to the backyard. Walking into the backyard was serene; the warm sunlight hit her skin blissfully, and the chilly wind cooled off any excess heat she might've retained. The birds were singing and chirping in the trees of the neighbors' yards, and Lincoln's own yard was smartly trimmed. Lana noticed something in the corner, by the wooden fence, and when she approached she gasped at what she saw. It was an artificial garden pond, with slabs of stone surrounding the clean water. But what immediately appealed to Lana was the small green frog laying calmly on one of the lily pads.

She carefully extended her hand, reaching to touch it. "H-Hey, little guy," she whispered soothingly. When the amphibian didn't hop away, she extended a finger to stroke its little hand, and she smiled to herself. "You really remind me of Hops. What's your name, little friend?"

The frog croaked.

"Oh right. Frogs can't talk," she chuckled. "Did my bro even give you a name? If he didn't, I guess I could. How about… Seymour?"

The frog croaked again, and Lana took it as a sign of approval. "Seymour it is, then."

Lana got down on her knees, pressing her overalls into the muddy ground around the garden pond as she lifted the frog into her hands. She felt like a naiad; a beautiful young woman with golden hair sitting by a fresh pond with the animals surrounding her. Well, to be fair, it was mostly a frog and a dragonfly, but Lana didn't want to take away from the artistry of her moment…

And then the frog flicked its tongue and ate the dragonfly. "Ah, come on, Seymour," Lana complained as the frog chewed on the bug, dripping some of its juices from its mouth onto her palm. "The three of us were having a moment."

If the frog could talk, it might've said something like '_Bitch, does it look like I care?'_

"Whatever. There will be other dragonflies. But, from the looks of things, it doesn't like there are any other frogs. Are you the only one?" Lana asked, scanning the pond for any sign of a frog or tadpole or egg she might've missed. The frog croaked in her hand, and its croak was more slow and melancholic than the ones before it. Lana understood what it meant, and rubbed her cheek against the animal comfortingly. "I'm sorry, Seymour. You must've been really lonely here, all by yourself. If I could, I'd bring you my old pet Hops and you two could've been friends, but he… you know, lifespans and all."

Frogs didn't live long, and Lana knew that, even back when she was a little girl. That didn't stop it from hurting when her favorite pet passed away. Thankfully, it was from natural causes and age, which meant Hops died painlessly and was more cared for than most frogs at the end of their lives. Still, as Lana dug the hole to bury him in, and as Lucy read her words over the shoe box grave Lana had given him, it didn't stop her from breaking into tears. And even years later, as a grown woman, the memories of her dead best friend still stung.

Seymour extended his tongue, and licked Lana's cheek. The morbid frown on her face slowly shifted into a bittersweet smile, and the young woman giggled. "Guess it's a good thing we found each other, Seymour. Seems we both need a friend, even if it's only for a little while."

Seymour let out a loud _ribbit_. If frogs could smile, this one would be.

"So you became friends with the frog in the backyard in the short time I was at the store, huh?"

Lana looked over her shoulder, Seymour still squatting in her hands, and found Lincoln standing over them, an amused grin on his face. "I swear, are you ever going to change, Lana?"

"Nope. If there's a frog, I will pet it. That's the Lana Loud guarantee!"

"Does the Lana Loud guarantee also include putting the frog down so that she could help her older brother carry a giant bag of doggy treats inside?"

"Giant bag? Lincoln, seriously, I didn't need that much."

The ashen haired youth shrugged. "Oh well, you know me. I always go out of my way to serve the people I love."

Lana didn't notice the odd phraseology of that sentence, and in a way, Lincoln didn't either.

The animal lover put the frog down on one of the lily pads, and pet its head gently with a smile. "I'll come hang out with you later. Right now, my dumb bro is making me do extra lifting because of his mistake," she told Seymour. The frog flicked its tongue at her eye, but Lana knew that was a common sign of affection, so she simply laughed as she stood up from the ground, and walked side by side with Lincoln to the car. He carried out his plastic bags, filled with human food and drink, while Lana eagerly carried her pet food inside.

When she dumped it on the table, she quickly turned around, back to the door, and called out to Lincoln. "Alright, I'm going to go back outside now!"

"Not so fast, Lana," he said as he pulled out a chair of the kitchen table. He revealed a carton of lemonade, and poured a glass for both himself and her, and invited her to sit in front of him. She sat down, and Lincoln took a long drink from his glass, the cold juice refreshing his parched throat. "I don't think we've really had an opportunity to sit down and for you to tell me what's been going on in your life."

"Don't worry about it, my life is pretty dull."

"Are you kidding? You work at a race track with one of the most popular racers in the sport. How can that be dull?"

"Well, it's not dull for me, obviously. But I'm pretty sure it would be boring for you to listen to, considering that you don't know that much about car parts. And even then, it's not really the kind of story you tell over and over again. It's exciting to replace the wheels while the clock is ticking, but it's not as interesting to tell people about it," Lana laughed. "Why don't you tell me some stuff you've gotten up to?"

"I… wouldn't recommend that. Last time I started catching up with someone, I ended up telling this weird story where Lori was a psychopath and Lucy was a witch."

"Wh-why?" Lana asked in pure confusion.

"It… it made sense at the time," Lincoln exhaled, his voice full of shame.

"You know, I think I feel bad enough that I might actually spill the beans," said Lana. She thought about farting at that moment, because that would be a funny twist on 'spill the beans', but then she remembered that she was a young woman now, and she needed to have more class.

So she started picking her nose and told Lincoln "Yeah, so you'll like to hear this. This is what Bobbie Fletcher told me when she decided to give me this vacation. I was actually fixing up my tools at the time..."

* * *

The car garage was almost empty. A lone light flickered above, occasionally lighting up the space with a bright orange flare. The ground was rough, as cracks broke through the asphalt, but it didn't bother the lone young mechanic sitting on a small stool, squatting over her equipment.

"Alright, let's make sure the air tools are still working right," Lana muttered to herself as she picked up her impact gun. She pressed on the trigger, which released bursts of compressed air, and Lana quickly turned to the air pressure regulators, tapping on the meters to make sure they were measuring correctly. When she found the tool working as intended, she nodded and set down carefully, checking it off her list. "And now the flashlight. Bet the batteries died in that piece of junk."

Lana reached down into her toolbox, and patted around, trying to find the metallic torch. She looked down and gasped. "Wait… where the hell is my flashlight?"

"You looking for this?" Lana heard. She spun her head around and saw Bobbie Fletcher standing behind her, in her casual clothes, with the flashlight pressed against her chin and shining upwards, as if she were about to tell a ghost story. "Muahahahahaha. You'll never find your flashlight, and you'll get fired for sure," the older woman joked. The light of the torch revealed a few wrinkles on her face, but otherwise Bobbie looked as youthful as she did when she offered Lana that job all those years ago. Truthfully, she never expected that young tomboy to take her up on her offer, but given Lana's track record at the pit stop, she was glad she did.

"That's real funny, Bobbie. The only thing funnier than that will be when your car finally explodes."

The racer snorted. "And what'll you do when that happens, dropout? Going to go print out the coupons for the next 'Meet This Racer' promo contest?"

"I got plenty of opportunities. A lot of racers have seen me, and they all want me on their teams. And maybe, given how my employer keeps stealing my stuff, I should take them up on that," Lana grinned evilly, making Bobbie laugh. She tossed Lana back her flashlight, and started pacing around her mechanic. She walked slowly, and mumbled to herself with every step, and Lana eyed her curiously. Eventually, Bobbie sighed, and looked down at Lana.

"So, uh, Lana, you know how you've been working with me for a long time?"

"Yep. Best months of my life!"

"Well, I've been thinking recently about your break time. And mostly the fact that you don't really take breaks. Like, at all."

Lana opened her mouth to respond to that, but quickly closed it, and began rubbing her chin, trying to think of a time in the past two years where she actually had a lot of time to herself. _I'm sure there's something. There's no way I've been working nonstop every month. Sure, I might've taken up another job in the off season, and still hung around Bobbie to do so menial tasks for her, but… but…_

"Oh no, you're right. I've never had a real break," Lana realized.

"Right. Which is why I'm here. I'm telling you, right now, both as your kinda-sorta boss and your friend, that you should take the next season off. You know, be with your family and friends and all that. Maybe catch up with a show you like. I don't know, whatever helps you blow off steam."

"Hey, hey, now. Maybe I don't need a break, you know? I mean, I love my job here. Working with tools is my favorite things in the world."

"You're calling me a tool?" Bobbie smirked and raised an eyebrow.

"You know what I meant."

"Look, Lana, some of us love our jobs. Not most of us, but some of us get lucky enough to be able to do what they love for a living, and I'm honestly happy for you that you've found your calling. But it's really not healthy to just be thinking about work all the time. I mean, look at you. You're an attractive young girl, and you don't even have a boyfriend."

"I… I haven't thought about lovey dovey crap. Don't call me out for it," Lana blushed, and preened some hair away from her face.

"See? Exactly my point, Lana. I want you to just take a little while for yourself, and you can do whatever you want with the time. Okay?"

Lana huffed, but eventually resigned herself to her fate. "Alright, fine. I'm sure the other mechanics can do fine without me."

"I know they can. They may not be as good as you, but Hernandez and Pulaski are hard workers. Just take the time and catch up with some family. And maybe you'll even find that special guy~" Bobbie teased.

Lana laughed, lightly smacking her friend, but deep within the recesses of her mind, her thoughts were returning to her white haired older brother…

* * *

Of course, Lana did not say the last part out loud. There was a deep shame in admitting that after Bobbie had told her to find 'that special guy' her thoughts turned to Lincoln. In fairness to her, he was the man she was closest to, and throughout her entire life Lincoln had been nothing but kind and supportive of her and her habits, especially when others had not been. But still, having feelings that go beyond platonic for a sibling was something Lana did not want to admit out loud. Not to him, and not to anyone else.

"She sounds like a fun person," Lincoln snorted.

"Well, she does drive a race car for a living. I doubt that would attract any boring people. Hell, most sports people tend to be like that. Like Lynn."

"Yeah, only Lynn never took my flashlight. She always snatched Bun Bun from me and tossed it at Luna, and then the two of them would play keep-away with me for the next ten minutes," Lincoln grunted, feeling justifiably bitter.

"Could've been worse. Lisa used to experiment on my frogs and rats all the time. A lot of them ended up with mutations."

"Our oldest sisters used to scream at me whenever I so much as looked at their smoothies."

"I used to be so scared of Lucy, I'd pray every night for her to not drag me under the bed and eat me."

"Remember Luan's April Fool's Days? On those days, she was the scary sister."

Lincoln and Lana started laughing, ending with both of them sighing. "I miss them a lot," Lana admitted. "I've made a lot of friends on the race tracks and most of them are fun, but there's nothing like seeing the faces of all our sisters when we bunched up for a group hug."

"So many adventures… so many memories..."

"Yeah, a lot of memories. Like the memory of that one time we caught you rubbing one out in the bathroom," Lana snickered.

"L-Lana!" he hissed, his face starting to grow red. It wasn't unusual for Lana to be crass, but bringing up such a humiliating memory at that moment was really inappropriate, even for her.

"I still remember what it was like. You grabbed a comic from the mail, hid it under your shirt, ran up the stairs and into the bathroom… then you forgot to lock the bathroom door and Leni walked in on you," Lana cried out with laughter. She slapped her knee in bemusement while Lincoln simply glared at her, irritation evident in his eyes. "And the worst part is you were still tugging on yourself and moaning for a quarter of a minute before you even noticed. Come to think of it, didn't you throw the comic aside and start imaging girls from your class?"

"Heh, yeah, maybe," Lincoln fake-laughed.

"'_Oh, Paige_~' '_Oh, Cristina_~' '_Oh, Girl Jordan_~'"

Lana laughed for a solid minute, her eyes clamped shut and her fists banging on the table while Lincoln coughed uncomfortably. One of his coughs finally made her open her eye and notice how annoyed her brother looked, and her laughter slowly died down. She exhaled loudly, before widening her eyes apologetically. "Lincoln, I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean to bother you like that."

"No, it's fine. Just a little annoyed, that's all," he shrugged.

"No, it's not fine. Fuck… I got carried away. I was like a bully for a second… fuck, Linc, I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have taken it so far..."

"Okay, Lana, seriously, calm down. I'm not super mad or anything. I just don't really want to talk about that. I mean, can you even imagine how embarrassing that was for me?"

"You're right, you're right. I shouldn't have brought it up. I'm sorry."

An uneasy silence hung over the heads of the two siblings. Lincoln and Lana both reached for the lemonade, hoping to pour a glass for themselves so the other would be the one forced to talk, but instead their hands brushed against each other. Lana retracted her's, giving Lincoln the chance to pour himself more citrus juice and sip it down as slowly as possible.

"I… I think I'm going upstairs. I forgot to, uh, call Dad and tell him how I'm doing."

She pushed her chair out and quickly scuttled away, rushing to the stairs. Lincoln put his glass down as he watched her go, and let out a sigh. He had just been annoyed with her a moment ago, but now he was deeply irritated with himself. "What's wrong with you, Linc?" he reprimanded himself. "She was just joking around. Why'd you have to go and be such a bitch about it?"

He reached up to his neck and tugged on his collar, as he was starting to feel heated around that area. "Seriously, what was it about her bringing up that whole thing that bothered me so much?" he wondered aloud as he stared up at the ceiling, watching the dusty ceiling fan slowly whir above his head.

Whatever feelings of regret and awkwardness Lincoln was feeling at that moment were nothing compared to Lana's rush of emotions. The door to the bathroom had swung open, and Lana had rushed in and slammed it behind her, angrily growling at herself as she dumped herself on the toilet and locked her fingers tightly. She stared down at her hands, and even thought about punching herself for a second. "I know I'm over-exaggerating right now, but fuck, that was embarrassing," she grumbled. "He's my big bro, and I'm squatting in his house, making fun of him for getting caught. Aww man! I'm the worst!"

Maybe it wasn't her brother's reaction to that story that was really bothering her. She did feel somewhat bad for bothering him, but hey, siblings make fun of each other. That's what they do, and if a few feelings were hurt, they'd both suck it up and forget about it in a few hours at most. Lola used to constantly tease Lincoln about the fact that he could just barely swim… so what made this different?

Maybe it was the stirrings Lana felt when she told that story.

While she was mocking Lincoln for getting caught masturbating, her imagination was going wild behind the scenes. She envisioned every detail of the incident, especially her brother's nude body. And it excited her, for reasons she didn't know. She assumed the image had been stuck in her mind because of shock of how hilarious it was in that moment, but now she wasn't so sure. Maybe there was something else at play. Something that could explain the rapid beating of heart behind her rib cage, or the nervous licking of her lips, or burning feeling in her loins…

_Fuck this. I gotta clear my mind._

She looked back at the door, extending an ear to listen for Lincoln. When she heard no footsteps in the hall or no masculine voice on the other side calling for her, she began to peel off the clothing wrapped around her nubile body. Her overalls fell to the ground, and she kicked them to the side before pulling down her pants. She opened the toilet covering, and sat back down again. Her teeth shivered slightly as her hand slowly went downwards, and a shiver ran through her spine as she touched herself. She could feel the wetness down there, and so, without hesitation, she stuck a finger inside…

* * *

"Lana! Lunch is here!"

Two steaming bags of Chinese chicken sat on the table. The smell wafted towards Lincoln's nose, and he inhaled the appetizing smell with a sigh. If there was any lingering feelings about what happened earlier, some good Chinese would eliminate them in an instant.

He waited for a few moments, tapping his fingers against the table patiently. He didn't hear any running or stumbling upstairs, so he huffed. "Great, now I need to go talk to her. Can't believe she's not letting this go," he muttered as he started up the stairs. With every step he took, the smell of delicious food faded, and another smell seemed to take its place, oddly enough. He lifted his nose into the air when he reached the second floor, and sniffed like a bloodhound. His nose pointed him to the right, where he followed a smell that equally parts sour and sweet.

The bathroom.

Lincoln gulped. He wasn't really about to invade on her privacy, was he? She could just come down for chicken whenever, so he should just try around and…

"_Ah, Lincoln~"_

He stopped dead in his tracks, and turned around. He leaned on the door, pressing his ear to it, and the wet sound of _shlick, shlick, shlick _echoed through the small bathroom. He knew he shouldn't have let his curiosity get the better of him. He knew he should've just left the door and walked away and ate some lunch by himself…

And then he remembered Lana mocking him for getting caught.

_Time for some payback, _he thought to himself with a smirk.

He peeked through, opening the door slightly, and thanking the Greek god of locks that Lana didn't lock the door. And what he saw made him swallow so hard his Adam's apple nearly bounced back into his brain.

Lana was rapidly fingering herself, her index and middle fingers rushing in and out of her cunny, sending waves of pleasure throughout her body. She was biting down on her lip, blushing furiously, and her head was thrown back with her eyes shut. Her hair was loose, unhindered by the bindings of her ponytail, and it splayed over her shoulders. She must've been imaging something nice, because her face read of bliss.

Another hand reached up and starting rubbing her clitoris, and she moaned loudly, bucking her hips as her fingers began to work faster. Then it traveled up her body, dripping sex juices on her shirt, until Lana squeezed her nipple tightly, and started to slowly massage her breasts. She rolled the orb around in her palm, and her groans of pleasure only got louder. Over at his side of the door, Lincoln realized what he was doing was taking things way too far, but now he was mesmerized by her milky thighs, and the soft beads of sweat that rolled down her face as she pleased herself.

Suddenly, her pace at her genitals began to increase, and Lana seemed to moan louder as she rubbed and fingered herself harder, her hips rocking against her hand to get as much enjoyment out of it as possible. She felt a bubbling pit form in her lower body, and she knew she was close. Through her grit teeth, she hissed "_Gah_, _Lincoln!" _as her vagina exploded with her fluids. She rained squirt all over the toilet, and she panted as she felt relief for the first time in a while.

And then she turned her head. Her eyes widened as she noticed her older brother peeping behind the door, now ajar enough to reveal his face. They stared into each other's eyes for a frightful moment, neither of them sure of what to say.

Then she glanced downwards slightly, and noticed his erect prick, throbbing beneath two layers of cloth.

"Lincoln… get... the fuck... away from me..." she muttered.

He did just that, leaving Lana alone for waves of self-hatred and disgust to wash over her.


	3. Chapter 3

**That Engineer: The most awkward is when the other person joins in, and stares into your eyes the whole time.**

**Jeff: Always assumed you were a Lincy guy tbh. And speaking of giving their relationship a chance really quickly... well, this chapter will answer that for you :P**

**Laharl's Vassal: There really isn't. I need to make a social media fandom challenge; every time someone is about to write an NSL story, they should write a Lanacoln instead. **

* * *

That night, Lincoln had a hard time sleeping.

Maybe it was the fact that he hadn't eaten much. He was sitting at the dining table, waiting for Lana to sit down with him so they could talk about… _that, _when his sister rushed in, grabbed her food, and dashed out without saying a single word. She barely even looked in his direction, keeping her eyes as far away from his person as possible. That, combined with the sight of his naked sister jilling off, left his stomach turning, and he could just barely finish a glass of cola.

So he went to bed with an empty stomach and a full mind, a terrible combination for sleep. The temperature of the room seemed to be too hot and too cold at the same time, and Lincoln was left rolling around on the mattress with one buzzing question beating at his brain...

_Why was she saying my name?_

He could try to convince himself of any nonsensical explanation if he tried. He could pretend like she was just calling out to him because she needed him to bring a toilet paper refill, or because she could hear his footsteps coming down the hall and that made her think of him. If he really wanted to, he could've brushed it off as nothing. But Lincoln was, unfortunately, not dumb enough to do that, leaving him with only explanation that could make sense...

Lana had a crush on him.

"I guess it's not weird for a little sister to fall for her big brother," Lincoln remarked. But he knew that reasoning was horseshit. Little sisters developed crushes on their brothers when they were in kindergarten, not when they were college age. And Lincoln doubted that she had had a puppy crush on him that lasted this long, especially when there were other, non-blood related men out there for her to fawn over. Which brought Lincoln to an even worse conclusion.

It wasn't just a crush. She was in love with him. Valentine-style.

He sighed, not sure how to deal with that revelation. It made sense, in hindsight. Out of ten siblings she could've spent time with over her break, she chose him. Lana could've dropped in to visit Lily and see how she was growing up, or could've visited Lori or Lynn at their amazing places, or she could've gone to see Lola, her literal closest sibling. But no, she chose to visit him, and all those blushes and stammers were starting to make more sense.

"And here I just wanted to see my sister after a long time."

Lincoln flipped in bed again, and reached for his phone. He checked the time, and realized it was almost two in the morning. "Well, I'm not getting any sleep any time soon," he grumbled to himself as he got out of bed. "Might as well get a midnight snack. Or a post-midnight snack, in this case. I don't know, I just want a waffle."

He put his hand gently on the doorknob, and opened the door so carefully and slowly you'd think it would explode if he opened it too fast. He lumbered into the hall, eyes scanning the dark floor for things to avoid, and ended up jamming his toe into a table by the stairs anyways. _FUCK! _He screamed internally as the pain rushed through his entire foot.

The worst part was that it was his small toe. He hoped it wasn't planning on swelling.

When he made sure the vase of flowers sitting on top of the table didn't wobble or tip over, his head shot back to Lana's room. He listened for any sound of disturbance, and waited with baited breath for five seconds. Then he turned back to the stairs and started walking down, cursing that table under his breath.

He was disappointed to find there were no waffles in the freezer when he there, so he opened up the fridge and searched around for anything to eat. There were a few slices of marble cake, wrapped up on a plate, and Lincoln almost reached for them until he remembered that those belonged to Clyde. _I mean, is he really going to miss them?_

_Yes, _the angel on his shoulder said.

He pushed those cakes aside and found some frozen solid slabs of white chocolate. Lincoln rolled his eyes, but took them anyways, and with the concentrated effort of a Greek hero, broke off a piece and put it in his mouth.

He was pretty sure he chipped another tooth by eating that. How long was that chocolate in there? It felt like a brick.

Regardless, he threw it back in and closed the refrigerator door and trudged back up the stairs as unsatisfied as when he went down. But hey, going up and down the stairs was exercise, so maybe that would help him get tired enough to sleep. That's how it worked, right? He was contemplating that as he passed by Lana's room, and heard a loud snore emit from behind the closed door at his side.

Lincoln couldn't stop himself. He peaked in at his younger sister, and immediately felt a powerful pang of guilt. He remembered how this whole thing between them started; he was in the same position now as he was earlier that day (or yesterday, technically) as he overlooked Lana in the privacy of her room. What was he even thinking when he spied her in the bathroom? _Payback for something that happened years ago? What am I, retarded?_

At least now it felt different. He felt like a protective, and guilt-ridden, older brother, looking over his sister after she had a difficult day. She seemed peaceful enough as she slept; her arms and legs were splayed over the mattress, the blanket covering some parts of her body while not doing a job good for others. If she felt cold, she didn't show it, because she just snored on. Her sleeping attire was noticeably short, with her shirt riding up to her chest and leaving his stomach and ribs exposed, and the bottom half of her body were just barely concealed with a pair of camo panties. The curtains were drawn in a way that allowed some beams of moonlight to hit her body, and even her blonde hair, which was normally duller, seemed to glow with a golden aura.

Lincoln swallowed heavily at the sight of his sister. In this light, she looked practically ravishing.

_Is it… is it really a bad thing to have a girl like her have feeling for you?_

That thought, combined with the stiffening Lincoln felt in his pants, told him that he needed to go. Now. Before he started thinking about things that would make him even more ashamed than he was before.

When the conflicted young man left the doorway, a single green eye opened, and the soft hum of snoring quickly stopped. Lana reached down to scratch her exposed belly button, and she listened as the sound of Lincoln's footsteps began to fade, until she heard a door slam shut. She had watched him as he thought she was sleeping, and even in the dark, Lana saw how his cock reacted to her. She knew what he wanted to do to her, and she wondered… if she had revealed she was awake, and she invited him to her bed… would he have done her right there and then?

But that was an 'if' question. The reality was that he was enticed, and chose to run from his feelings.

The fact that she was considering that option filling with a rush of shame, but also excitement. She shivered at the thought, because brothers and sisters weren't supposed to do that, but boy, did she want him to do that to her… and yet, she could offer him, and she'd know he wouldn't accept. Not if today and yesterday were any indication.

"Pussy," she grumbled, both resentful and relieved.

* * *

When Lincoln found Lana gone the next morning, he wasn't too surprised. He considered calling her, but just shrugged it off and hoped she'd have a good day out. It was her vacation, after all, and going out sightseeing was a lot better than being cooped up at home. So he pushed her out of his mind as he went back into the kitchen to eat breakfast. He grabbed a box of cereal and put it on the table, next to a bowl and spoon. And when he went to the fridge to get some milk, he found that some of Clyde's pound cake had been taken by Lana. "Dang it," he muttered.

When he finished breakfast, he went out to the porch, pulled up a chair and sat down, breathing in the crisp morning air. He looked over to the flower vine Lana had made such a big deal out of, and noticed that the buds were beginning to bloom. One of them had even grown into a fully-developed flower, and Lincoln had to smile when he saw it. "Alright, let's see how sweet these things actually are," he said as he reached over and nipped at the flower, carrying a thin piece of the plant towards his mouth and dipping it in. His tongue rolled over the nectar of the flower, and he couldn't lie… it was the best thing he had tasted all week. "We need to grow more of these things, for the whole year. I want this stuff year-round."

After that, he went over to the backyard and stood by the small pond for a few moments, watching as Lana's new frog Seymour swam around in the fresh water. Truthfully, Lincoln wasn't too fond of having the amphibian around, because of the dangers of what would happen if Seymour left the pond one day to hop around. There were birds and cats and other predators hanging around, and there were the man-made dangers of running him over with a car or bike, or accidentally slicing him up with the lawnmower… things could get ugly, and Lana already lost Seymour once. Lincoln decided to leave the frog be for now, if only to not make things even weirder between him and Lana, but knew that once everything got cleared up they needed to have a talk.

"Of course, you could always stick around if you agreed to help pay rent," Lincoln told the frog, who responded with a loud croak.

_Speaking about rent, I should probably get started on another commission piece. I'll go check my inbox._

Lincoln turned back inside and, with no delight or joy at the prospect, got on his computer to check his inbox for any offers. Business was slow recently, so the artist only found on potential commission. He checked the price offer, and his jaw dropped. _Three hundred fucking dollars? For a single picture? This guy's got to be foreign, I don't think he gets how much that is. Whatever, not like I'm going to correct him. Who is he, anyways?_

Lincoln read the username, and then he understood why the price was so high.

And then he groaned.

"Out of the billions of people with internet access, why did this guy have to be one of them?"

The person in question was a very annoying user by the name **LewdSodamata16**, and he was infamous for commissioning people at high prices to draw incest pairings. Rumor had it that he was actually a wealthy Kuwaiti billionaire, which made sense to Lincoln; who else would throw around hundreds of dollars like they were circus peanuts?

Well, at least his request was tame; those two rabbit siblings from that Nick show, Warren and Bella, grinding each other in bed. Lincoln sighed with relief; he was expecting some Kama Sutra shit or something. "Well, at least art will keep my mind off… her..." he mumbled, thinking about Lana. He plugged in his tablet, reached for his pen, and started to work on the lining.

Lincoln was a fast artist, so he was thankfully able to get through most of the drawing in the afternoon. Background, linework, shadows… all that was really left was the coloring, and worst case scenario, he could just pass that off to someone else. All in all, a pretty decent job. The best part was that he didn't think about his problem the whole time. In fact, what was his problem again?

He remembered when he heard the front door open, and his problem walked in.

"H-Hey, Lincoln."

"Hey, Lana," he greeted, turning in his swivel chair. The young woman was dressed in a green hoodie, and judging from how sweaty it was, she must've been busy. "How, uh, how's the day been treating you?"

"Good. You?"

"Pretty good. Yeah. I've started a drawing."

"What are you drawing?"

"Uh, actually… never mind, it's weird."

"Oh, I see."

If awkwardness were a force of nature, Lincoln and Lana were pretty sure they were weaponizing it at that very moment.

The silver haired young man sighed, slumping his shoulders and head. He twiddled his fingers before looking back up to Lana. "So, I think we both need to talk about what happened yesterday. In the bathroom, I mean."

"No, there's nothing to talk about. I just didn't lock the door. It was an… it was an accident," Lana muttered, now beginning to wonder if that was even true.

"You didn't lock the door, and then instead of turning away when I heard and saw you, I hung around and watched you for a few seconds. I guess I had this idea that… since you were making fun of me for getting, I should get a chance to do the same to you..."

"And then you heard what I said. Y-Your name."

"Right. Were you… um… you know, thinking about m-"

"No!" Lana jumped to deny. "It was just something that I said, and I don't remember why. I was thinking about some guy I know from the track. Actually, why am I telling you that? It's none of your business, and you were the one who butt into my privacy."

"You're right. And I'm sorry for that," Lincoln apologized.

"Look, let's just move past this, okay? I only got a limited time to spend with you, and I'd honestly rather not spend it thinking about a bad thing that happened. Let's just go back to our normal family things. Eat at the table, watch something before bed, and maybe tomorrow you can take me to one of the sites."

"Oh yeah, that reminds me. Where were you earlier?"

"I was on the bike," Lana pointed her thumb in the direction of the garage. "Don't really get a lot of bike time on the race track, and I've really liked biking ever since you gave me that bike of yours when I was six or seven or something. So when I saw your mountain bike in the garage, I assumed you wouldn't mind."

"You took my mountain bike out?"

"Yeah. Is there a problem?"

Lincoln started to chuckle, and slapped his knee weakly. "Well, I don't have a problem with you taking out the bike in the garage, but that's not mine. That's my roomie's. Damn, Lana, that's the second thing you took from Clyde today. First his cake, now his bike..."

"Seriously? Shit. I hope he won't be mad about it."

"I doubt he would be mad about the bike, he's chill with sharing it. The cake, though… don't worry, I'll tell him it was me," Lincoln winked, and Lana smirked.

"Thanks, Linc. You're the best."

"No problem, Lans."

The two siblings stared at each other, the tension in the room slowly ebbing away and fading as if it were a bad fart disappearing into the wind. They smiled kindly, and their eyes met with a static shock of electricity. Her eyes were as green as emeralds, and his eyes were as blue as sapphires…

They both thought of the other as the most beautiful thing in the world at that moment.

Lana blushed, and coughed lightly. "Right. So, I'm just going to go upstairs now. Been thinking about binge watching something while I'm cooped up inside the house. Got any suggestion that aren't weeb Chinese cartoons?"

Lincoln shrugged. "To be honest, I don't really know what you'd be into. Um… Top Gear, maybe? That seems up your aisle, right?"

Lana snorted. "You know, I could be into shows you wouldn't expect. I have depth and layers. If Lucy can watch Princess Pony..."

"Do _you _want to watch Princess Pony?"

Lana scowled. "Hell no, that show's _goily_."

"Then Top Gear is my final recommendation."

Lana stuck out her tongue childishly. "You're no fun."

As the young woman rushed back upstairs to her computer, Lincoln found himself feeling more calm and refreshed than he had when he was out with the flowers. "I'm just glad things are starting to feel normal and good again," he noted. He tapped his hand against his chair, and realized that he still hadn't put his tablet pen down. He spun around in his chair, facing his screen again, and hit the space bar to get his computer out of sleep mode. His conversation with Lana had left reinvigorated, and since his drawing tool was already in his hand, he decided to keep drawing. Not the commission, though. He wanted to draw something a bit more close to home.

"What should I even draw next, though?" he thought out loud, tapping his pen against his chin. "What does the world desperately need to see?"

Lincoln couldn't settle on a single idea. He had a long mental list of crap he wanted to draw sometime that month, but as much as he wanted to do those ideas, none of them appealed to him at that present moment. Eventually, he just shrugged, and opted to do whatever felt right in the moment. "Just let the pen guide you, Lincoln. Don't think, just act."

That last part of advice was almost literal for Lincoln. Years of drawing and inking gave him the astounding ability to mentally dip out while he was doodling. Those were moments when it felt less like he was creating something, and more like the picture in his mind already existed, and was using him as a vessel to come into creation. Those were his favorite types of pictures to draw; they were usually more personal, and they often came out looking really well, even before he went back to fix the line work or facial expressions.

So he let his hands get to work, only vaguely aware of what he was specifically doing. It wasn't until he finished with the outline that he was drawing a naked young woman. He gave her eyelashes, a blush, a pair of red lips, a curved body, a dripping cunny, golden hair tied together in a long ponytail…

It wasn't until he drew the red hat on top that he took a step back and realized what he had just drawn.

A rough gasp exited his throat when he gazed at his creation, and every negative, nauseated and horrified feeling he had just buried a while ago bubbled up into a roaring volcano of terror and disgust.

He was staring at a drawing of Lana.

His sister, lying naked on his bed.

Her body stretched along his bed frame, and she stared back at her brother and creator with a bashful look of love and lust, her mouth curved into a seductive smile as she beckoned him towards her, one hand gripping the pillow and the other tracing the outline of womanhood.

His ears began to ring as the reality started to set in… he had just drawn his nude sister seducing him to sleep with her.

"Wh-why? Why her?" Lincoln asked himself in a shaky voice. "What's wrong with me? Do I want her? This is just so fucked!" he yelled as he threw his mechanical pen at the wall. It shattered into pieces, and they fell to the ground, but Lincoln didn't care. All he could think about was the twisted image of his sister on his computer screen… and how much he wanted her. How nice it felt to draw her, to look upon her now, to see her with unbrotherly eyes.

"Why did it have to be her?" he finally sighed in a defeated voice. He checked the screen one final time, hoping that maybe he had made a mistake, but no, it was clearly and unmistakably the spitting image of Lana Loud. In a moment of dark humor, he thought about how cool it was that he got every detail of her down in his art, and that made him chuckle. _And now I have to deal with a broken pen, _he thought, turned around to check the wall where he had thrown the small object…

And found none other than Lana herself standing at the doorway, her eyes glued to his screen, glancing between him, his drawing of her, and her own body, as if she were comparing.

"Lincoln… what is that?"

He cringed at her question.

"Sorry. I mean… who is that? Is that me?" she asked, even though the nude blonde looked unmistakably like her.

"Lana, I..."

She raised a shaking hand, stopping him for saying anything else. "So you feel the same way, huh? You caught the same feelings I did..." she said, her voice dripping with an odd tone. It was very similar to disbelief and confusion, but there were hints of relief buried underneath.

The young woman turned, and glanced over her shoulder at her brother. "So, uh, you know how I keep my door closed every night when I sleep?"

Lincoln nodded slowly.

"Tonight, my door's going to be open. Wide open," she said in a neutral voice. She ran her fingers through her hair, and left back upstairs without another word.

"Did she just… yeah, of course she did."

His shame and loathing was quickly replaced by desire, and the young man rose to his feet. He checked the clock on his wall, and looked out the window to the setting sun in the west. He knew what she wanted to happen in a few hours…

And he knew he wanted the same.

* * *

_It's now or never, I guess._

Lincoln thought that as he lay in his bed, arms crossed behind his head, cradling it as he thought about what was going to happen next. Or rather, what could happen next, he wasn't exactly sure what he and she were going to… yeah, no, he was lying to himself. He knew exactly what was going to happen if he went into that room with her. He reached over to the table next to him, grabbed an ice-cold glass of water and swallowed it all in one gulp. The frigidity shocked his body into action, and soon enough he was lumbering down the hallway, steps hesitant and breaths frightful.

True to her word, Lana had left the door wide open. It seemed insignificant from the outside, but Lincoln knew the significance of this. Lana had always slept with the door closed, as the lizards and snakes she roomed with in the past needed closed circulation so the heat in the room could build up, and Lana's own biology followed suit. She was at the point that having the door open bothered her by physically and mentally, so in a way, Lincoln would've been a worse person if he had just left her waiting expectantly as the warmth of her bedroom rushed out and the icy grip of the cold swept in. That made him feel just a little better.

He took a step forward, then another back. His hesitation was expected. This wasn't any girl, or even any sister… it was Lana. His baby sister that always had such a pure smile. Was he ready to do anything to her?

The image of his lewd drawing flashed in his mind, and that answered his question.

When he stepped into her room, he found her reading a pet magazine. She was wrapped in a bathrobe, tied so that not a hint of skin caught his eye other than her hands and ankles. When Lana looked up at the silver haired young man, she smirked, putting the magazine down at her side. "Took you long enough. What, were you taking your Viagras?"

"I'm not that old. I'm not even that much older than you."

"I'm Gen Z. Anyone six months older than me is basically a fossil."

"A fossil… so basically an old _bone_?" Lincoln grinned darkly back, putting extra emphasis on his last word.

Lana chuckled lightly, before relaxing herself with a sigh. She looked at him with eyes filled with adoration and eros, and she ran a finger over her lips. "I've wanted this for a long time, Lincoln," she started in a soft voice, "and I always thought it would never be. I never imagined that my big bro looked at me with the same desire as I looked at him."

"I… I'm not proud of it," he admitted.

"Neither am I. I mean, when the feelings first popped up when I was six or seven, I thought they would go away. But no, they just got stronger with every passing year. I watched you grow up into a handsome man, and I thought I would never be good enough for you."

"Why would you think that?"

"You know they used to call me an ugly carpet-muncher back at school? You hear that enough times and you start to believe it. It wasn't much easier at home, when you're surrounded by girls way more feminine than you. Even Lynn and Luna could put on a girly show for the guys they liked. Not me."

She smiled at him after that. "You always made it easy, though. Growing up and now. When I saw you drawing me like you did, I saw the beauty in me for once. And, both earlier today and earlier in my life, you always let me know that being good looking wasn't about makeup and perfume and wearing fancy dresses that are impossible to run in. It's just about being you. And being me made me a trash-talking, animal-loving, machine-fixing tomboy… and you found that beautiful about me."

"Really? All I did was draw a picture by accident," Lincoln shrugged with an awkward grimace.

"Pfft. What can I say, bro? Girls like to feel good about themselves. Now," she said, her tone flickering from heartfelt to steamy, "on the subject of feeling good..."

"Wow, that fast? No foreplay or anything?" Lincoln joked.

Lana tossed a pillow at him. "There, we had a pre-sex pillow fight and I spilled my feelings to you in a way I never plan to again. So can we just got on with the show? I've been waiting for my entire life for this, Lincoln!" she whined.

Lincoln sighed. Honestly, what right did he have delaying anything? If he had any hesitation or morality left, he would've stayed in his room.

"I know what'll get you to speed up," Lana remarked entrancingly. She got on her knees, pressing them against the sinking mattress, and slowly raised her hands to robe and started to part the two halves. The wonder with which Lincoln watched was almost as if he were watching the miracle of the Red Sea parting. His eyes were trained on her like a hawk as she revealed her ample mammaries, her nipples standing firm and erect. The cloth fell away from the rest of her body as well, and by the time her robe had floated gently to the floor, Lincoln felt a hot swelling in his pants.

Lana laughed with a tomboyish teasing as she lay on the bed, in the exact same position as his picture. "Does this entice you enough, Linc?"

As she was asking, he was tearing off his clothes, so that pretty much answered her question.

He sat on the bed, by her side, and slowly crawled towards her. He gripped her shoulders tightly, making Lana shudder at the contact of their skins, and Lincoln asked her to look into his eyes. They were positively mesmerizing that night.

"Just one final time, so we both know what we want for sure… do you want this, little sis?"

"I want this, Lincoln. I really do. I want you. More than anything in the whole wide world," she whispered to him.

"More than a Scooby Snack?" he joked, finally stepping into his confident state as his hands traveled down her shoulders to her chest. He started to rub her breasts, and Lana began to moan. Her heard beat with every flick and poke at her sensitive nubs, and the massaging of her chest made her drool.

"Sh-Shut up, Lincoln! I think I'm getting ready for another type of snack tonight," she said as she dropped her head back into her pillow, wiggling comfortably until she hit that perfect spot of comfort. "And lucky you, Linc… you're going to be on top while I feed."

She pulled him down towards her, crashing his mouth against her lips, and the two began to eat at each other's mouths.

She could feel fireworks exploding in her brain as she realized it was finally happening. Her brother was finally in love with her, and finally acting on his carnal instincts. _Yes… yes… YES! _She cheered for herself. If she were just slightly more feminine, she might've started crying right there and then.

His arms stretched out and dug into the bed, on either side of her head. His palms pushed down into the spongy material, until they found their way to her burning body once again. He wrapped his arms around her, and she wrapped her's around him, drawing the both of them closer together. He could feel his dick hardening in between their nude bodies, and it was pressing against the lips of her pussy. He shifted slightly, and they both shivered as sensitive rushes of pleasure raced through their bodies. It wasn't a new sensation for Lincoln, but it was always a good one.

It was new to Lana, though, and she loved every moment in which his manhood worshiped the temple of her body.

They kissed for several more minutes, neither of them willing to break their passionate kiss while their bodies rubbed against each other. Being with Lana was a different feeling than being with any other girl he had dated. She seemed more caring and kind, her arms more welcoming, and the heartbeat he felt from the womanly body pressed against him was sincere proof that she loved him. And it made him feel ready for what was to come next...

"Lana..." he breathed her name, and she looked up at him with sparkling eyes.

"Lincoln… now?" she asked, still relying on the guidance of her older brother.

"Only if you want."

"I do. Do it now, Lincoln. Make me a grown up!"

Her legs spread underneath him, so Lincoln began to position himself at her sopping opening. He held his manhood in his hand like a spear, though he was too nervous to advance anymore. Lana must have sensed his indecision, because she started trailing her untrimmed fingers across his shaven chest. "Don't be nervous, Linc," she whispered to him in a voice pooling with desire.

He let out a high, anxious breath and lowered himself slowly into her body, stretching her walls as much as he could with his girth. She tensed up as he pushed in. Her toes curled and uncurled, and she leapt up and mantled her hands around his neck and shoulders, hugging him tightly as she felt him fill her insides to their limits.

"Fuck, Lincoln," she moaned tensely.

"What? What's wrong, Lana? Are you okay?"

"Y-Yeah, I'm good," she gasped. "It's just... it's my first time, so there's a little pain."

"If it makes you feel better, it's my first time too," he admitted. Technically, that was true. A handjob from Stella didn't exactly count as a first time...

"It is, huh? Well… do whatever you want with me, Lincoln. Use me for all those rough fantasies you cooked up," she grinned, taking it like a champ.

"Sorry to disappoint, but I'm not about that hardcore life," Lincoln said as he kissed her softly. He kept his and her mouths pressed together as he started to slowly thrust back and forth into her cunt, causing her to moan heavily as he did.

"Dammit, you feel so good, Lana," Lincoln grunted as he pumped his hips.

She hissed as he leaned in to start kissing and sucking at her neck, but she welcomed the attention. Her own hips were rocking now. Her first time was starting out incredibly painful, all things considered, but there was a sense that the pain here was worth it. Maybe it was the fact that the cause of her pain was the man she loved most in life. She didn't want to disappoint him, and more importantly, she didn't want to disappoint herself by ruining her first experience with sex.

"Just like that, Linc. Keep on keeping on," she grinned as he kept pumping into her.

Her pain had passed at this point, leaving every sense filled with the highest form of pleasure. He lowered his head yet again, in a gymnastic feet, and started to kiss at her breasts. He started softly with them, but even that slowly turned into him aggressively peppering her chest with a barrage of kisses. His ears were ringing now, and the only thing he could hear were his own thoughts and desires, and those told him to go faster and faster. She stopped moaned as his pace increased, and by the time she felt his dick start battering at her body, she was screaming and crying with mirth.

"K-Keep going Lincoln. Don't stop for a second!" she panted raggedly and loudly into his ear, her orgasm drawing closer and closer, like a stalking beast hiding inside her snatch.

When it finally pounced towards the front of her pussy, Lana threw her head back and screamed "LINCOLN!" as loud as she could. A steep wave of pleasure surged through her body, and it slipped out of her in the form of a scented deluge of naughty water. And with every flood and deluge, there is an earthquake, which was the best way to describe her inner walls closing and contracting around his throbbing hardness.

The pair held onto each other bindingly, before Lana pushed him away from herself with the feeble strength she could muster. She then turned around, maneuvering herself on his penis, and pressed her back against her brother's chest.

"What are you doing? Didn't you finish?" he asked in a gasp as she lifted her arms, threw them back, and wrapped them around his neck.

"I did. You didn't," she answered coyly.

She dropped to her knees, her arms sweeping across the bed until she was lying flat against the bed, with Lincoln crotch poking at her buttcheeks and pussy.

"And I'm not truly finished until you are," she said hoarsely, breathing deeply as he firmly grabbed her hips and pushed his cock deeper into her dripping womanhood than before, thanks to their new position. Lana's sex was already feeling tender, but now it was screaming as he slowly started to push in and out of her. And when he picked up his speed, she began crying out again.

"Yes! Fuck me, Linc. Fuck me as hard as you can. This feels so fucking good!" she panted as the white haired young man pounded her young body fiercely from behind. He kept up his rhythm of thrusts and jabs as his hands reached around her back to scoop up her ample and soft breasts. Her arms, in turn, flew around to his shoulders, and she did her best to stroke and massage them as he was doing for her.

"I'm glad you feel good from this, Lans. I know an older brother should never say this to his little sister, but your body feels really good to me too," Lincoln laughed as he pulled the blonde out of her doggy position to sit with her back straight, both of them now on their knees.

"I don't… think… brother and sister… is what we should think of each other as... from now on," Lana grunted, her tongue rolling out of her mouth in an almost _ahegao _way. "From now on, you're my boyfriend. My partner. My soulmate."

"I'll think of you in the same way," he nodded in agreement as he kept pumping into her body. His dick was now throbbing harder than before, and the sheer tightness of Lana's insides weren't helping. Her ooze helped lubricate everything, but Lincoln knew the dangers of letting out his ooze inside her, as much as he wanted to. He really did; he wanted to spray those trembling, quivering, healthy red walls with his sperm, dumping everything inside Lana. It probably would've felt much better than tearing it out and spraying into the open air. But alas, his brain wasn't completely overridden with lust, so he held tightly onto her body as he felt himself begin to cum. He quickly tore his tool out, Lana groaning loudly as he did, and began to shoot on her blanket. His dick still grinded against her clit, rubbing her into her second orgasm of the night.

He continued to hold on to Lana, his beloved sister, as the two rode out everything. There was a point where she began to whimper and moan, but he hugged her close and affectionately, and she met his touch with a kiss. As the euphoria began to fade from their minds, they both fell back and collapsed, both going out of their way to avoid the wet spot Lincoln had left. "Gross, dude, you jizzed on my blanket," Lana complained, no appreciation for the moment.

"Heh. Sorry," he chuckled. "I'll get you a new one. Probably some new sheets, too."

"Oh, Linc… you don't need to do that. I already know where I'm going to sleep instead."

"Where?"

She smiled at him as she crawled over to him, falling on top of her older brother. "How about your bed~?" she offered with a minxy tone.

He could've argued, but he was tired now. So instead, he laughed and picked her up, carrying the deflowered teen to his room, and laying her gently on the bedspread. He lay down next to her, giving her an awkward and caring smile, and he wrapped his arms around her again. They were still naked, but the desire to rut into each other was weakened (though not gone, they are young adults, after all) and all either of them had any desire to do was sit there and be in each other's presence.

"I can't believe I just had sex with my brother," Lana said suddenly. "I mean, not just because we're related and all that. I mean… I had some fierce competition. I'm glad I won, though."

"Competition? You mean like… Paige?"

Lana shook her head, her hair dancing from side to side. "I don't think you ever noticed this, but I wasn't the only one that had a crush on you. Lola did, too."

"You're not joking?"

"Nope. She used to be crazy about you. Why do you think she always wanted you to play tea party and be her knight and help her out with her pageants? She used to really like you, like I did. Though, with her I guess it was more of a childish crush that she moved past. I never really changed..."

Lincoln pecked her cheek, and in spite of everything that had just happened between them, the tomboyish girl still blushed. "I'm glad you didn't. Because I love you, Lana."

"I love you too, Linc," she said in turn.

The two fell asleep a few moments after, their soft snoring filling the room. Before she drifted off to bed, Lana chuckled, her body shaking in her sleeping brother's grasp.

"Next time, though, we're doing it my way. You may be into vanilla sex, but I sure as hell ain't..."

* * *

**People have told me I needed to try more dialogue in my lemons. So here's my attempt. It felt kinda weird keeping them talking, if I'm being honest. But hey, it's a lemon nonetheless. That counts for something.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Tristen: No**

**LoudRisque: lol I don't even do commissions (nor am I Kuwaiti… or even rich ;-;). And since you bring it up, I have thought about writing a Lisacoln fic for a long time now. I'll come up with the right idea sometime...**

* * *

There was a certain floating feeling Lana felt as she slept well into the later hours of the morning. She felt elated and comforted, both by the warm, soft bed she slept in, and by her older brother's presence, sleeping protectively by her side. It was the same feeling she often got when she slept in his bed back as a child; when she felt her brother's draping arm wrapped around her, she knew no nightmares could ever get to her, and her dreams were filled with the sky and clouds…

So it really sucked when she brought back down to Earth by a shrill ringing sound traveling through the hall.

"The hell? Why's that thing even ringing? I don't even have an alarm. Someone must be calling," she grumbled as she opened two tired eyes and started marching back to her room. She had no idea if she overslept or underslept, but what she did know was that whoever was on the other side of the phone was about to get a mouthful.

At least, that's what Lana was planning to do until she read the caller ID. "Bobbie?" Lana read off the phone in disbelief. "Why's she calling me? Did Pulaski fuck up again?"

Well, she'd find out in a second. She tapped her touch screen to accept the call, and greeted the racer. "Good morning, Bobbie. Why are you calling this early?"

"_Well, first thing's first, Lana… do you hear yourself right now? You sound like a sloth coming off a sugar high."_

"I had a… long night," Lana said, hoping to play it off. Unfortunately for her, she heard Bobbie squee into her ear, and she knew what the older woman was about to say.

"_EEEEEE! Lana's got a boyfriend, Lana's got a boyfriend… so tell me, who's the lucky guy? Or girl, I don't really know if you swing that way..."_

"You know it doesn't have to be a guy or girl, right? I could've been up all night for other reasons."

"_Lana, if you're going to tell me that you stayed up all night playing video games or watching movies, I think I'm actually going to cry. Because that would be the saddest thing ever. Even more sad than that time my little nephew tried to book an airplane ticket to Heaven to talk to his dead friend."_

"Wow, that brought my mood down. Okay, fine, I'll tell you. Just don't make me feel even worse than I already do," Lana caved in. As Bobbie continued squealing on the other side of the phone, the blonde let out an uneasy huff of air as she glanced back to her brother's bedroom. He was still fast asleep, his chest rising and falling with every soft snore, and his normally ruffled hair was even messier now. She smiled lightly at the sight, before her heart fell and sunk into the pit of her stomach. _No one can ever know about us. We gotta hide this secret and take it with us to the grave._

"_Lana, you still there?"_

"Uh, yeah, yeah," Lana stammered. "Anyways, I was just about to say that… yeah, I did sleep with a guy. We're in a relationship now. I mean, we were always in a relationship, it's just changed now..."

"_So from 'it's complicated' to 'we're dating' type of change, right?"_

_More like 'we're normal people' to 'our wedding is going to have the same family on both aisles', _Lana thought.

"Yeah, sorta like that," Lana fibbed. "But I doubt you called me up to congratulate me on the sex you didn't even know I had until a few moments ago. Unless you were spying on me, which I doubt. So what's up?"

"_Oh, right. Sorry, got a little excited and side-tracked thinking about my BBF finally becoming a grown-up. What I meant to talk to you about is… you know that small town you hail from? Royal Woods?"_

A hesitant shudder of suspicion raised through Lana's body at that moment. Alarms bells activated in her brain as she whispered "Yes," in as faint a voice as possible.

"_Well, good news! I just dropped into my apartment out here, to catch up on some of my vacation days too. Why don't you swing on by, and bring that guy of yours with you? That's an order from your boss, by the way. No, not really, I'm just joking, but I'd love to meet the guy that made a woman of the tomboy to end all tomboys."_

"You… you want to meet Linc- him?"

"_Sure do. Does he like fruit punch or lemonade more? I'll make whatever you two want."_

"Uh… both. Neither. I don't know. I'm sorry, Bobbie, I have to go now," Lana blabbed as she swiped at the red button to end their call. The older woman didn't even have time to say goodbye before the line went flat, but that was the least of Lana's concerns at the moment. Her biggest concern was, instead, the fact that Bobbie was in town, wanted to catch up, and wanted to meet her boyfriend. Her _blood-related_ boyfriend.

Lana weighed her options. She couldn't pass Lincoln off as some random person she met at a club or something; there was no way Bobbie didn't recognize that distinctive white hair on her brother. She could always make Lincoln dye his hair, but Lana doubted that they could color an entire head of hair in a few hours.

_Unless we can? No, even then there would be problems. I think I must've shown Bobbie some recent picture of Lincoln, and you can't change an entire facial structure with a fresh coat of hair dye. __I could pretend that he had to go to work! No, wait, it's the weekend. Ooh, come on, Lana, think!_

As Lana pumped her brain into coming up with a good solution, she began to pace back and forth in the hall, her feet tapping noisily against the creaky wooden floorboards. The noise carried back to Lincoln's room, who grunted angrily at the sounds disturbing his slumber. He grabbed his pillow and wrapped it around his ears, but by that point his eyes were open and he was fast awake. "Dang it, I wanted to sleep in," he grunted as he came to. He stretched his arms into the air, yawning loudly, before smacking his lips and scratching at his lower back. "G-Good morning, Lana," he said tiredly.

His sister stopped her pacing, and she smiled lightly at him. Regardless of circumstance, it did lighten her up whenever she heard him speak. "Morning, Lincoln. Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah. Helps that I got a work-out and everything drained out of me before I slept," he chuckled.

"You know, most people wouldn't be chuckling if they woke up and realized they had slept with their little sisters. They'd be horrified and screaming."

Lincoln shrugged. "Guess it hasn't hit me yet. I might feel a little bad later, but eh..."

"Well, at least you can be the calm one in this situation. I'm freaking out! Turns out Bobbie Fletcher is in Royal Woods, she wants to meet up with me and talk, I accidentally told her I had a boyfriend, and now she doesn't just want to meet me, because she also wants to meet you!"

Again, Lincoln shrugged. "Okay. So you don't want your boss to find out you had sex with your brother. Why not just take some random guy and pass him off as your boyfriend? Also, I don't know if we ever agreed to using the b-word..."

"Shut up, Lincoln, that's what we are now. Deal with it. And it's not that easy, finding someone else. Where am I supposed to find some random guy to go with me on such short notice?"

"Oh, right. Um… you could always pretend I'm actually your cousin," Lincoln suggested with a teasing grin.

"Did you get that solution from your weeb shows?" Lana scowled.

"No," Lincoln denied, even though he did.

Lana sighed wearily and slumped on corner of the bed. Her hands crossed between themselves, twiddling and twirling her thumbs as she began to shudder uncomfortably, her face contorted between looks of sadness and fright. "It's been such a roller coaster these past few hours. Between you and Bobbie Fletcher and everything else… I feel like throwing up. And now that doesn't even sound like something I'd want to do."

She felt an arm wrap itself around her shoulder as Lincoln, now wearing a pair of sweat pants, drew her closer to him for a caring semi-hug. He rubbed her shoulder with his hand, and she felt comforted by his presence, nuzzling closer to him. Her problems seemed to be so much less scary when she had someone there to face them with her, especially when that someone was Lincoln.

"Look, I know you're in a weird place right now, and you weren't expecting any of this and it's all happening so fast, but you should know that I want you to rely on me. I know I haven't always been the most reliable in the past, but trust me this time. If there's anything I could say or do to help you, I want to do it. Because I love you, Lans," he said, adding a light kiss at the end.

"Yeah, you're right. I know I can rely on you for this stuff. If we can work together perfectly on this, we can pull this off. So what I need for you to do right now, Lincoln… go take a shower and put on some deodorant, you smell awful."

"As if you're one to judge," Lincoln rolled his eyes.

"Hey, people expect me to smell bad. But, since I need to force both of us in there for when we meet Bobbie, I am willing to… conserve water, if you get my drift~"

"Wait, we're going to meet Bobbie? That's your final choice?" Lincoln asked, clearly too thick-headed to understand Lana's innuendo.

"Yes, Lincoln. So let's go shower already. It can even be together, if you want."

"Y-Yes, please," said Lincoln with a nod.

Fuckin' pervert.

* * *

When the car pulled up to the address Bobbie had given them, Lana was somewhat disappointed by what she saw. The apartment building was tall, yes, standing at around ten floors (give or take) and from her downward angle it looked like the thin rod on the roof was cutting into the gray clouds of the dark sky like a blade. But it didn't really seem like a place where you would find a famous, race car driving superstar. The building was a drab, sandy color, which may sound like a contradiction, but somehow this complex pulled it off. There seemed to be only two windows per floor, one for each room, and they were all opaque. And then there were the little details, like how the window on the third floor was covered in dirt and soil, while the people on the fifth floor seemed to be growing plants outside their windows, and Lana doubted those plants were going to be used for anything permissible by law.

Other than that, it seemed fine. The portly security guard squatting outside the building's entrance gave Lana and Lincoln a friendly smile as they passed him, so it probably wasn't a dangerous area. Just not an exceptionally amazing place either.

"I thought people like Bobbie made a lot of money," Lincoln said to Lana as they got in the elevator. "So what's she doing in a place like this?"

"Beats me. I'm as lost as you are. We can ask her when we get there. Speaking of which… you remember the script, right?"

The older sibling nodded. "Don't worry about a thing, I got this."

"That's exactly what I'm worried about," Lana admitted truthfully, "because you have a really bad record of being dependable."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"When I was six, you left me and some of our sisters alone in a public place to get an autograph. When I saw eight, you dropped the turtle I gave you to take care of into the sewer. When I was seventeen, you almost ruined Thanksgiving, and nearly drove Dad into a mental breakdown, in the famous cranberry incident… need I go on?"

Lincoln crossed his arms grumpily. "I can be dependable _sometimes._"

Lana chuckled and patted her brother's shoulder. "Luckily, those sometimes are when I need them most. Like right now, hopefully."

The elevator doors opened with a ding, slowly sliding away as Lincoln stepped out. Lana joined him a minute later, once she was done smearing a particularly hard-to-get booger on the wall with a triumphant smirk.

Now that she was finally standing on the ninth floor, Lana gulped as the pressure to perform came crashing down on her thin shoulders. She exhaled calmly, reminding herself that Bobbie may have been her boss, but she was also a very casual person, and a good friend, so even in the worst case scenario, things would end up okay.

_Alright, Lana, it's showtime. _

The two walked over to the door on the right, avoiding some of the shoes and slippers that say before it, and Lana extended a finger to ring the doorbell. It zapped her lightly, and she yelped as she pulled it back, deciding to just knock instead. There was a brief scuffling on the other side, only for the door to open and reveal Bobbie, wearing clothes that Lana never thought she'd see her wear. The Bobbie she knew wore either her "work clothes" or a hoodie with a tracksuit. This Bobbie was wearing… a _dress_.

Granted, it wasn't an exceptionally feminine dress, and it looked pretty plain, but still, it was a dress!

"Lana! Good to see you," Bobbie exclaimed as she reached forward to hug her friend. Lana was still stunned by the clothing she wore, but she shook her head and chose to ignore it as she hugged Bobbie back, patting her back slightly.

"Hey Bobbie. Good to see you too after a long five days."

"Oh heck, time is an illusion. Five days without you around feels like five slow years in a detention center. Believe me, I would know, I was in there for… oh, hello," she stopped her story as she noticed Lincoln standing there. She broke her hug with Lana and extended a hand to shake. "Now don't tell me, I remember you're Lana's brother… I forgot your name, though."

"Lincoln. Lincoln Loud. I'm Lana's _adopted _brother. Yep, completely not related by blood to her. I was picked up by her parents and we live together now. I mean, we used to. Did I mention that we're not blood related?"

Lana felt like facepalming.

_You had one job, Lincoln. To follow the fucking script. We agreed no adoption stuff!_

"O-Okay, then," Bobbie said as she drew her hand back. "That's, er, mighty kind of them. I'm sure they're proud to see the boy they chose grew up to be such a good, strapping young man. And speaking of strapping young men, Lana… I thought you were going to bring your boyfriend around..."

"Did I mention I'm adopted? Just really want to make sure you keep that in mind."

"_Shut up, Lincoln,_" Lana hissed through grit teeth. She turned back to Bobbie with a semi-apologetic smile on her face. "It's a long story, honestly. We can talk about inside, if you want. It's kinda cold out here."

"Oh shoot, where are my manners? Come on in, you two."

When the two siblings stepped in, they marveled at the place Bobbie had set up for herself. The living room was large, though only a certain percentage of the space was occupied. There was a couch, a small table, and a TV screen set up facing the couch. To their sides were two doors, one leading into a cramped kitchen, and one that was closed, but presumably led to the bathroom and bedroom. They both glanced back at Bobbie, eyebrows cocked, and the sport-car driver shrugged. "I know it's pretty plain, but sometimes I just need a break from the high life. Simple room, simple clothes, simple town… the works."

"Would you really call Royal Woods a simple town, though? I'm pretty sure a lot of my sister Lisa's experiments formed an underground society for robots and mutants."

Bobbie smirked. "Point taken. Can I offer you guys anything to drink? I made both lemonade and fruit punch, because I wasn't sure which one you'd prefer."

"I'll have some punch," Lana requested.

"Lemonade sounds good to me," Lincoln said.

As Bobbie turned to her table and began pouring her guests their beverages, she did notice that the two of them were just a little rigid and stiff. They seemed somewhat uncomfortable to be in her apartment. Bobbie explained it away to herself as Lincoln being awkward around strangers and Lana not wanting to do anything stupid in front of her boss, but what she couldn't explain away was how the siblings seemed to steal glances at each other when they thought she wasn't looking…

Then again, it was probably nothing.

Bobbie handed them each their cups, and told them not to take a drink. She poured a glass of fruit punch for herself, and turned to the brother and sister with a grin. "I propose a little toast. You two interested?"

"Sure. What are we toasting?" Lana asked.

"How about you, Lana? To Lana Loud, the best dang mechanic on the race track, and the best dang friend in the whole country," Bobbie toasted, lifting her glass. Lana cringed with embarrassment, but she didn't cringe really hard until Lincoln stood and joined Bobbie.

"To Lana. A girl I grew up with and whose shown me that she's full of talent and beauty."

He smiled down at her, and the young woman blushed. "Aw, hell, let's just get it over with," she giggled as she raised her cup as well. The three glasses all came crashing together with a loud clinking sound, and the three drained their cups with vigor. Lana finished her punch first, and wiped her mouth of the red juice. "That was pretty good. Little sweet, though."

"Well, the recipe is just fruit punch from the store and add a little sugar, so yeah, of course it's sweet," Bobbie chortled as she set her cup down on the table.

"You're adding sugar to an already sugary drink? If I didn't know you any better, I'd swear you were trying to give me cavities."

"As if you don't already have a ton. And what can I say? I got a sugar tooth, and I'd die for sweet things. Speaking of sweet things..."

"Bobbie, not again," Lana rolled her eyes.

"Sorry, Lana, but I'm just so happy for you! You're an amazing young girl and I'm so glad that you found that perfect guy at a… at a… where did you meet that guy again?"

"We, uh, met at a f-family reunion," Lana stammered, before blushing and realizing what she had just said. "I mean, we did meet there, but he wasn't family. He's just a family friend. That someone brought with them to a family reunion because… aren't we all sons and daughters of the same two people all those thousands of years ago?"

Bobbie cocked an eyebrow, with an odd and quizzical look on her face. Her mouth bunched to the side as she looked over to her older brother, who shrugged and said "I, uh, tried to beat him up. No one touches my sister. Grrr," he said in the least convincing way imaginable. If Bobbie wasn't confused before, she was definitely starting to get inklings of uncertainty.

"Right. So what's this guy's name?"

"His name is Lin- Lynn. His name is Lynn. Lynn Skipperstein. Though we just call him Skippy for short."

"Wasn't Lynn your Dad's name? Geez, and I thought I had a bit of a daddy complex..."

"Haha, what? As if I would sleep with someone that reminds me of a family member. Why, that's about as stupid as me sleeping with a family member. You're… you're funny, Bobbie," Lana laughed, wiping away a fake tear.

"Right, right… Lana, is there anything you aren't telling me about this guy? I mean, aside from everything. If you want to keep it private, I'll totally respect that, and I'm sorry for intruding. I just wanted to hear the good news about you," Bobbie told her in an apologetic tone.

"I… I get that, Bobbie. I really get that. You're a good friend. It's just that what me and he have isn't a really normal relationship, and I don't know how you'd react."

"Lana, please, I've seen all kinds of weird misses and hisses get together. I do race at a race track, after all, and we get all kinds of freaky people who come on down to watch the races. I've met a guy married to an ostrich, a teen about to propose to his elementary school teacher, a young woman who was just a little too enthusiastic about her foot massager..."

"What about incestuous couples? Have you ever met those?"

Bobbie's eyes widened, as did Lincoln's. The young man hissed "_Lana," _between his grit teeth, before looking back to Lana's boss and smiling weakly for her. "She, uh, she's just asking because she's dating a cousin… twice removed. No, thrice removed. Sorry about the lie about the family friend, but you know how it is. You know, in some cultures, cousin marriage is completely acceptable, and it is legal in many parts of this great nation. Oh, America, it's so wonderful… have I mentioned that I'm adopted?"

The trio fell silent, and Lincoln awkwardly circled his drink in his cup. He decided it would be best if he diverted the conversation away from the touchy topic, and so he asked Bobbie "So Bobbie, I'm pretty curious as to what you do when you're not in a car? Do you have any hobbies or activities outside of racing?"

"Well, I do believe that people shouldn't specialize in one thing, if you get what I mean. We're complicated creatures, and I like to follow up on that by trying out all sorts of fields. I had a music phase, a poetry phase, a gardening phase, a drawing phase..."

"Drawing phase?" Lincoln asked excitedly, gripping the edges of his seat. "Oh please tell me you did digital art."

"Sure did. I wasn't very good at it, though," Bobbie smiled sheepishly. "I could draw the lines, but everything after that was a mess. Shading was the worst."

"Which software did you use? If you used the same ones I do, I could give you some tips if you ever feel like picking the brush back up again."

Lana sighed in relief as her brother and boss began exchanging artist talk that she honestly couldn't follow. Something about strokes or SAI or whatever. She was just glad that Linc had changed the topic, especially after she brought up such a weird turning point for the conversation. _Why did I ask her about that? It's so suspicious and creepy._

But fine, it didn't matter now. As long as the rest of the visit went by smoothly, Lana would have nothing to worry about. And thankfully she didn't. She eventually managed to reinsert herself into the conversation, and the three of them spent the rest of the afternoon just talking about life. It was especially fun for Lana to see how her brother was handling meeting a celebrity, but he seemed to handle it gracefully. She supposed that in his mind, she was less of a superstar and more of a boss of one of his sisters, so he made sure to keep a cool head.

She loved that about him _EEEEEE!_

But eventually, it got late (and before anyone complains about me skipping the conversation, do you honestly care?), and Lana stretched with a long, drawn-out yawn. "Well, Bobbie, I think me and Lincoln should get going. Thanks for the drinks and snacks, and it was good that you met Lincoln. He might be a bit of a nerd, but he's my nerd," she said affectionately.

"Alright, sure. It was nice seeing you in your hometown. Place is a lot nicer than I thought it would be," Bobbie said as she escorted the two out of her apartment. They waved as the elevator opened slowly for them, and Bobbie only closed the door after she heard the whirring of the machinery as it sent them to the ground floor. She smiled to herself, feeling a sense of pride at being hospitable, before she turned back to where Lana and Lincoln had been sitting.

And then she frowned.

"Looks like Lana forgot her phone," Bobbie said as she picked the cellular device up. "I should go downstairs quick and get to her..."

* * *

"I think that went really well. Even though we were clearly not on the same page about which script we'd be using," Lincoln said.

"Hey, don't blame me. I said the adopted brother thing was stupid. It's still banging your brother. Of course I wouldn't go with that."

"So you made someone up and choose the worst fake name for him ever?"

"I named him Skippy. After that kid I used to like. He was really sweet," Lana reminisced fondly, letting out a soft sigh and blushing.

The elevator stopped with a light bump, and the two siblings emerged. Lincoln fished around his pocket for his keys, grumbling as he did about the potential competition. Lana chuckled as she overhead some of his words, and patted his arm. "You don't have to worry too much. Unless you think the memory of an elementary schooler is ready to steal your woman away."

"Sorry. Jealousy issues. You'd have them too if you had the romantic history I had," Lincoln responded as he pushed the button to open the locks on the car. But before he could climb in, he felt Lana pounce on him and push him up against the car, a sly and lecherous look on her face.

"You know, I could prove to you right now that you don't need to worry about anyone else."

"Y-Yeah? How?"

Lana smirked, licked her lips, and leaned in to press them against her brother's mouth. Her tongue bypassed his teeth and lips, and started to explore the young man's tongue, lashing at it and tasting it until it started to lash back. She tightened her grip on him, getting swept up in the lusty moment, and she began to hum and whine into their kiss. She even tried to lift her leg all girly-like, like she saw the girls do in the movies, before she set it firmly back down on the ground. The kiss was heavenly, and the whole world seemed to swirl around her, and nothing could stop her from enjoying this moment…

"L-LANA?!"

The shrill cry broke the young couple apart, and they both opened their eyes and stared in horror at Bobbie Fletcher, still panting. The brunette stared at them with disbelief, before her mouth rounded, as the dots began to connect in her head. The odd stares… the absent boyfriend… Lincoln and Lana's weird comments...

"Dang it… you fell in love with your brother, didn't you?"

"What? N-No, Bobbie, this is a misunderstanding. We, uh, it's just a sibling kiss..."

"Lana… you fell in love with your brother, didn't you?" Bobbie repeated.

The world seemed to close in on Lana. She felt a tightening in her chest, and a lack of air. Her brain seemed to freeze with chilled fear, and in her worried state she couldn't stop herself from nodding, confirming Bobbie's worst suspicions.

"And you slept with him, didn't you?"

Lana nodded again.

"And he's not really not blood related, is he?"

Lana nodded one final time, sealing her fate.

"I… do you two, er, mind if I take a second? I need to process this..."

Bobbie turned around, though she kept her eyes on the sibling-lover until her head was completely turned. She took a deep breath, trying to keep her stomach from turning inside out. "Well, that's not something that you hear every day," she whispered. She felt shocked, like she didn't know if she wanted to be angry, disgusted, worried or a mix of all three. She was progressive, sure, and she hypothetically supported all kinds of love. But incest? That wasn't the same as homosexuality or BDSM… there was something more inert, buried in the culture and biology of human beings that said it wasn't allowed, no matter what. Maybe, if this were some random new story she were reading about some random siblings she'd never heard of, her thoughts would be different… but this was Lana. Her friend, her mechanic. Learning that she was dating her brother had to be the strangest experience of her whole year. Even weirder than the alligator and pancakes fiasco…

Bobbie pinched herself to make sure she wasn't dreaming. She was disappointed when she felt it sting.

"Lana, listen, you're my friend, okay?" she said as she turned back to a visibly upset Lana. "No matter what life choices you make, you're still my friend. And I'm glad you found someone to be happy with, even if it is… your brother. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't really make this into a huge thing, but..."

"But?" Lana repeated.

"You have to understand, Lana, that what's happening between you and your brother isn't allowed in normal society, or even sport society. I'm trying to think in the perspective of a working woman. If someone on my team is doing something with such big implications… that could pose a problem for me."

"Are you… what are you saying?"

"Calm down, calm down, I'm not firing you. Not yet, at least. I still need to think about this. On one side if news of this somehow breaks out, my management is going to hang me. And the fans… I'm just saying, careers have been destroyed over less."

"On the other side?" Lincoln interrupted, hoping Bobbie would give her sister some lining of hope.

"On the other side, Lana, you are the best dang repairwoman that's ever graced the field, and more importantly, you're a friend. And I'll be damned if I let some corporate overlord get between us. Just… give me some time to think, alright? Honestly, it is a really good thing you told me about… you two as soon as possible. Now I can figure out what I need to do."

"I get it. Thanks, Bobbie," Lana muttered, tapping Lincoln's leg. "I think we need to go now. Sorry for disturbing you."

"I'm sorry for bothering you two, and pressuring you into feeling like you had to tell me about your relationship," Bobbie said truthfully as Lana and Lincoln slunk into the car. Lana closed the door forcefully behind her, the sound echoing through the lot, and Bobbie watched with sad eyes as the vehicle drove off into the distance. She bit down on her lip, her brain scrambling for an answer for what she wanted to do with this new information.

_Fucking hell, Lana. Why'd you do something like this?_

* * *

Back in the car, Lincoln gave a worried glance towards his sister. She sat silently in the passenger seat, staring ahead darkly. Her mind was clearly racing with thoughts, and when Lincoln tried to reach over and reassured her with his touch, she slapped his hand away.

"Leave me alone, Lincoln. I don't wanna talk right now."

Those were the only words exchanged in that ride home.

When they pulled up in the driveway, Lana dashed out of the car and ran inside, and Lincoln could do nothing but watch and sigh sadly. He didn't know what Bobbie was going to do to Lana, but he knew his sister was expecting a worst-case scenario.

As he meekly walked over to the front door, he glanced over at the flowers growing on his porch.

He touched a withered one, and its petals crumbled in his hand.


	5. Chapter 5

_Say what you will, this trip hasn't been boring._

Lana chuckled humorlessly to herself as she turned over in bed again. She had been awake for at least two hours now, but any will to leave her bed was completely sapped out of her. She honestly thought that if she stepped one foot on the ground, it would just crumble beneath her and send her falling towards the center of the Earth. Maybe that wouldn't be too bad, though. There would probably be some cool bugs and dinosaurs underground… she'd have to ask Lisa about that.

"Who am I kidding?" she grumbled, flipping over on her back to stare at the ceiling. "There are no dinosaurs down there. That's how life is; it dangles something cool in front of your face and then slaps you once you finally get around to taking it."

Lana thought about what she said for a moment, then grimaced. "And I just realized I might be talking about more than just lizards."

Of course she was. She was talking about Lincoln, and Bobbie, and how either one of those two people could be responsible for ruining her life in the next few hours. Two people she thought she was close to, two people that meant a lot to her… and now they were splitting her in half, dividing her with a moral dilemma. It wasn't really their faults, Lana knew. Lincoln didn't choose to reciprocate her feelings and Bobbie didn't choose to work in a society where bad PR means no job, and no job means death. If anything, Lana should've blamed herself for everything. She was the one who forced Lincoln up against a car and starting giving him a tongue bath, right there in public. People always talk about how exciting the risk of getting caught is, but they never talk about how much it sucks when you actually get caught.

Speaking of Lincoln, Lana knew she should go talk to him. She was being a bitch to him for no reason. Even with every sense urging her to stay in bed, she decided to stand up and plant her bare feet against the cold ground. She wobbled slightly, her head immediately getting dizzy. "Whoops. Stood up too fast," she said as she placed a hand on the wall to steady herself. "Now let's go talk to Freckles."

Lana strolled down the stairs, trying to be quiet so she could sneak and scope out the bottom floor. Unfortunately, quiet wasn't Lana's style, so the grease monkey ungracefully tripped and fell, planting her face firmly in floorboards.

Very oof.

She got up and starting scouring around, though her older brother was nowhere to be seen. She rubbed her chin as she wondered where he was. Then she heard a loud noise coming from outside, followed by a familiar sigh of frustration, and that answered her question.

She put on a pair of slippers and opened the door to the backyard, then walked around to the side of the house. There Lincoln stood, scowling angrily at a flipped over trash can, garbage spilling out onto his feet. The bag seemed shredded and torn, with little teeth and claw marks, and Lana immediately knew what animal did it. "Looks like a raccoon got in the trash," Lana pointed out.

Lincoln turned towards his sister, then took a surprised step back, as if he didn't notice she was there. But then he nodded in agreement. "Well, I thought it might've been a cat, but I'll trust your judgment."

"A cat? Why would you think it's a cat? Those claw marks are _way _off."

"Lana, we don't all have encyclopedic knowledge about small animals, okay?" he sighed wearily, before putting on a small smile. "So are you feeling better today?"

"A little. I guess I slept most of it off, but I still feel a bit like crap. And worried. I'm… I'm really worried," Lana admitted. "I'm just terrified about what Bobbie is going to say. I mean, there's no way she's going to keep me around. I'm too much of a liability now, and… honestly, I don't know if she even approves of what we're doing."

"I see. I'm, uh, sorry."

"For what?"

"For roping you into this," Lincoln said. "You had a good thing going for you. You had good career prospects and a happy life, and then I had to come along and bundle it up with..."

"Ugh, can you just stop it with the pity and the blame already?" Lana snapped in annoyed frustration.

_Huh. Guess I'm not as over it as I thought I was._

Lana decided the best thing to do was to just walk away before she slipped up again. As she stormed away, she did look over her shoulder to see Lincoln with his mouth gaping, with the look of a man that had just been slapped in the face. That did make Lana feel a little guilty. She hoped he'd understand.

Lana crawled back to her room and reached for one of her bags, loudly unzipping the zipper and pulling out a large, chrome laptop. The computer was huge and heavy, so Lana tried to not use it too much, but unfortunately in all the excitement and drama last night, she had forgotten to take her phone from Bobbie, which left the hefty laptop as her only means of communication with anyone outside the neighborhood. She waited for it to boot up, typed in her password, and then was rather impatient as the software loaded up her desktop. She immediately began tapping on the Firefox icon, even though she knew she should've waited for a few moments.

Finally the browser window popped up. Lana knew if Bobbie had come to a decision, she would send her an email. Hopefully she wouldn't use the work email, because Lana had no idea who was watching over that one. _This would be so much easier if I had just gotten my phone._

She scanned her bookmarks for her email, then crossed her fingers after she clicked on it. _Please let it be good news, please let it be good news, _she prayed to whoever would grant a favor to the sinful girl.

And there it was. In large, bold letters.

B. Fletcher.

Lana gulped. Her finger reached towards the mouse pad, but it quickly stopped. "What if it is bad news? What if she tells me I'm fired?" Lana said in a shaky, terrified voice. She started to breathe heavily, and a cold sweat broke out as she stared at the message sent to her.

She was too terrified to click on it and read what was inside. Maybe it would've been better that way. That way, she could imagine a world where Bobbie didn't decide on anything. That way, nothing could hurt her, right?

Even Lana knew that was a crock of bull. So with a nervous finger, she tapped on the email, bracing herself for the worst…

_Lana, we need to talk in person. Drop by my place later this afternoon. And remind me to give you your phone._

"That's it?" Lana asked, poking at her screen. "Three sentences? That's it?"

She read over it again and again. Where was the forceful tone, or apologetic message, or the 'Your services are no longer required' at the end? Was she not getting fired? No, there was still a chance of that, and Lana was still on edge. But for just a brief, shining moment, Lana was able to exhale with ease, and even form the semblance of a smile.

"Later this afternoon will decide everything. Let's get ready for then."

* * *

Over at the apartment complex, behind the monitor screen, Bobbie Fletcher stretched back from her computer. She read over her lines again, and wondered if she had been too brief. Maybe she should send a follow-up email, just to make sure…

_Is that really necessary? She knows to drop by, so that's pretty much it._

"Yeah, I guess," Bobbie said.

She looked over to the side of her computer, next to the wireless mouse, and there it was. Lana's smartphone. The racer picked the small device up and started spinning it in her hand, though she was careful not to scratch it in any way. Lana, Lana, Lana… it all came back to her. Some random girl she had made a promise to almost a hundred years ago that showed up out of nowhere, demanded a job, did the best job ever... and then spread her legs for her brother. "Damn, Lana, why'd you put in this position?" Bobbie grumbled to herself. "Why are you forcing me to have this debate with myself?"

When she thought about what upset her most about Lana dating her brother, it wasn't really a sense of morality. Sure, she didn't like the act, but she'd met people dating family members before. One of her roommates from her college days went on to have three kids with their cousin. But the gross feeling was almost microscopic compared to the true emotion driving Bobbie…

Fear.

Bobbie didn't have much to her name. Her family was poor and her grades were in the toilet, so driving around a race car was all she really had. There was a drive to get as many advertisers as possible, because those guys were going to be paying her medical bills one day. But more than that, it was something she loved doing. The rush, the thrill, the sheer _sport _of it all. Bobbie lived for that. And it could all be taken away if Lana's secret got out. She had seen other athletes fall from grace. Steroids scandals, wife abuse… hell, sometimes dating within the same gender got backlash. Imagine the screams and jeers if what Lana was doing got out…

Bobbie shuddered.

Though perhaps there was another guiding force to Bobbie's actions. She pressed the home button on the phone, and the lockscreen appeared. Lana had chosen an image of herself as the lockscreen icon; she was dressed in her usual blues and greens, though her blonde hair was unimpeded by a hat or a ponytail. Instead it flowed freely in front of the beautifully painted wall she was standing in front of.

Bobbie hated to admit it, but the picture made her cheeks redden.

She set the phone down with a sigh, and started thinking those annoying and poetic thoughts about love and life that pop up in everyone's head every once in a while. Heart wants what it wants, choices ahead of us in life, family is thicker than blood and blood is thicker than water, yada yada yada. Bobbie rolled her eyes at such annoying cliches.

"Guess the reason they're cliches is because they have some truth to them," she shrugged. She glanced up at the clock on her wall, ready to count the seconds until Lana arrived. It was one in the afternoon, which meant Lana wasn't going to drop by for a long while. Bobbie sighed, both relieved and tense. "I think I'll go buy some more punch with the spare time," she said to herself as she closed her computer shut.

* * *

Not wanting to get another ride with Lincoln, Lana chose to instead catch a taxi. She, unfortunately, didn't have her phone, so she couldn't pull up the map coordinates that Bobbie sent her, so she instead relied on the power of memory to get her where she needed. Funny enough, it was actually much easier to know where to go when she was farther from the place. Take that highway, go up that bridge, a left over there. It was when they got closer that it got harder, as Lana had to remember which of these identical buildings was the one she was looking for.

But then she remembered one singular detail, and her eyes became attuned to finding it. She grinned when noticed it, and she pointed at the building in question. "That one right there. Park there."

"Are you sure?" the driver asked.

"Yup. I recognize those drug plants on the fifth floor."

The taxi driver laughed when he heard that, and pulled over into the lot. Lana stepped out of the car, and paid the middle aged man his fare. When the taxi drove off, Lana watched as it disappeared down a long road, almost as if he were driving into the golden-colored horizon and the dim sun at the end.

Unlike yesterday, the elevator was busted. If this were another day, Lana would've gladly pulled out a wrench and fixed the whole system, but she had neither the tools nor the time. If Bobbie could still somehow be persuaded to take her side, she knew it would be best not to keep her waiting. So Lana took a deep breath and started jogging up the stairs, pumping her legs and arms and huffing her breaths. The first four floors were easy, but by the time she got to the fifth floor, it was almost like climbing Mount Everest. Didn't help that the stairs were so dirty that if Lana had spilled some seeds on the ground, she would've found a garden when she came back.

Finally, she made it to the ninth floor. She wheezed as she practically crawled up the remaining flight. She was sweating now, too, which didn't help her already less-than-pleasant scent. "I'm here," she cried out in a wheeze as her foot stamped on the final step, and she took a few minutes to rest against the railing and catch her breath.

_Boy, if I fell down now, that would probably be the end of me. That's not even funny to think about._

But she needed to think about something. Anything to distract her from the rapid, nervous beating in her chest.

Every step she took towards the front door of Bobbie's apartment was more fearful than the last. The hallway seemed to elongate, and the closer she got to the imposing door, the farther it seemed to go. She really didn't want to do this; she wanted to go away. To run, and run so fast that she could reverse time and fix her dumb mistakes. Her entire body broke out in goosebumps when she imagined how disappointed and disgusted Bobbie must be with her, and she bit down to try and hold herself together. "I really wish someone was here with me," she whispered. "I… I wish I brought Lincoln."

It was like being a little girl and walking to the principal's office all over again.

She mustered up the strength to knock on the door, and jumped back when she heard the locks immediately open. Bobbie opened the door to Lana, a sheepish smile plastered on her aging face. "Hey. I think this, uh, belongs to you," she said as she handed Lana back her phone.

"Thanks. I'm sorry I left it with you by accident."

Bobbie waved her hand, dismissing her apology. "Don't worry about it. And before you worry, you didn't get any important calls. You did get a call from someone named 'IGNORE THIS NUMBER' but that's it."

Lana smiled lightly. "That's a robocaller my sister Lisa set up to bother me. It's a bit of a prank."

"Okay. That's kinda funny. So, um, come inside?"

Lana nodded grimly, and stepped once again into Bobbie's home. The air was different this time. Yesterday, there was a more casual and relaxed mood that permeated through the apartment, but today there was more discomfort in the atmosphere, so much so that Lana could practically taste it. Homes truly do reflect their owns, because it was clear from the way Bobbie sat down in front of Lana, all tense and uncomfortable, that it was her aura pouring into the state of things.

Lana was almost certain she was going to get fired now. That she was going to lose that once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to live out her childhood dream.

"Can I get you anything before we start?" Bobbie asked, still trying to maintain her hospitality.

"No thanks. I'm full," Lana said. She was too sick to her stomach for snacks or punch.

"Right. So, uh, I guess I should tell you that I've thought about it. About you and your brother. And boy, was it one of the most difficult things I've had to dwell upon in my life. One thing that changes the closer you get to the top is that you end up having to make more difficult choices, and… well, yeah, that's what I had to do."

"Are you… are we splitting ways now?" Lana asked.

Bobbie bit down on her lip, looking troubled. "Now, listen here, Lans, and I want you to not interrupt me while I'm talking, because I have something really important to say, okay?"

"Sure."

Bobbie took a deep breath before starting, exhaling to get all her thoughts in order. "Lana, ever since we met, I've been incredibly impressed by you. You're easily one of the greatest repairwomen the world has ever seen. But you're more than just your toolbox. You have this way of always being so in-tune with other people, even if you don't think you are. You may not be the most talkative, yes, but you're so friendly and likable that you can just squat in with any group of people. And it's really cool to me because of how much people used to bully you and harass you. You still maintain that positivity despite all that. I always respected that in you, and because of that I wanted to always support you.

"But sometimes I can't. And I'm not saying this to make myself a good person. I'm saying this because I'm honestly scared. A scaredy coward, that can't handle the confrontation that'll come if what you and your brother have ever becomes public. And it will, if you stay in the spotlight. Nothing ever remains a secret. If you and your brother keep up your relationship, and you stay on my pit crew, it will come out, and we'll all be in deep water. Me, you, him, and the rest of my team, even though they've done nothing wrong. So as much as it pains me, I'm left with no option other than to give you a choice. Or an ultimatum, I'm not going to disguise my shittiness with nice language.

"Two options. On one hand, you could go back to your brother, and we part ways. I won't say a word to anyone, but we can't work together anymore, and I'll go back to being another personality on your TV box. On the other hand, you stay with me and… dump Lincoln."

"You want me… to break it off with Lincoln?"

Bobbie nodded. "I'm sorry, but that's all I can offer you."

"No, Bobbie, don't you think there's a chance? Maybe there's something we're not seeing..."

"There's nothing else I can do."

"But… but he's the guy I fell in love with. I can't help it that he's related to me. It's not my fault that's what was written for us!"

"Maybe you could find someone else. I'm sure there are other guys and… girls," Bobbie preened a strand of her hair as she said that word, "that you've also loved, or could see yourself loving. Believe me, Lana, I know what it's like to have feelings for someone you shouldn't. I… I'm also in love, believe it or not."

"With who?"

"With… with a talented, beautiful young woman, who's way younger than me. She's so young, that we met when she was a little kid and I was starting out my career, and most folks will look at that love with disgust. But she's been by my side for a long while, and… and I love her."

Lana stared at her for a moment, confused as to what she meant, before her eyes widened with shock. She gasped lightly, and pointed a shaky finger at herself. Bobbie nodded solemnly, before reaching over to grip the blonde's hand. "I know this is sudden, and I know I shouldn't ask you to consider this, but… in the end, this is your choice to make. You can choose me, or choose him. As a friend, and… as a lover. Please, Lana, make the best choice."

Her mind was blank, and her heart was racing. The room spun around her, and if she had the option, she would've ducked to the ground and covered her head, waiting for everything to pass.

But she didn't. Lana was a grown woman now. So as she sat there, hands shaking and eyes watering, she knew she had to choose between the two most important things in her life.

Her childhood dream job, and the life that followed.

Or her childhood crush, the love still burning intensely for him.

So when she finally decided, and muttered her answer, she knew she had lost a precious part of her younger self forever.

* * *

Lincoln lay in bed, now beginning to worry about Lana. He had called her phone twice, with no answer. His feet shifted underneath his blanket as he thought about where Lana could be at that moment; could she have gotten lost? Was she stuck in traffic? Did whatever taxi she take break down somewhere. He swallowed anxiously, and muttered a silent prayer for her to come home safe.

His prayer was answered by a loud knocking on the door. He jumped out of bed and rushed downstairs, quickly opening the door for his sister. "Lana," he said her name quietly, in a voice of relief.

She stood stiff in his doorway, her head hanging and aimed at the ground. When she lifted her face to look at him, the moonlight shone on her features, and Lincoln saw traces of two trails rolling down from her eyes.

She had been crying.

She collapsed into his arms, and Lincoln staggered to support her. She wrapped herself around him, burrowing her face into his shirt, tears threatening to spill over again.

"I chose you," she choked out in a sob. "I chose you."


	6. Chapter 6

**LoudHouseForever/Tristen: I'd tell ya, but then I'd have to kill ya ;)**

**That Engineer: I'd imagine the press would be far more forgiving of a huge age gap than of a brother and sister engaged with each other. And while, yes, Lana could get another job, it's more about how much it hurts her that she has to give up her job working alongside a woman she's idolized since she was young.**

* * *

Lincoln decided to skip classes the next day. He decided that when he rolled over in bed to find his younger sister was still holding onto him, with a clingy iron grip. The two had slept together last night, though they didn't _sleep _together. The night was mostly spent with her telling him everything and him comforting her towards the end.

He smiled lightly as he reached over to her face. She was snoring, and with every exhale a strand of her yellow hair flew into the air before returning to its place on her nose when she inhaled. He brushed it to the side, and his touch awoke Lana. She groaned gently, stretching her arms and legs in bed before relaxing them and lolling her head to face Lincoln. "G'morning."

"Good morning, Lana," he said.

"Your breath smells really bad," Lana smiled.

"Don't act like you don't like it."

"I never said I didn't."

Lincoln flipped over to his side, using his arm to prop up his head. The last time they went to bed together, they wore nothing, but this time the two were so tired and choked by emotions that they simply collapsed next to each other, still wearing their regular day clothes. "How, uh, how are you feeling, Lana? You doing alright?"

"I don't think I'll be doing alright ever again. Or maybe that's too over-dramatic. I won't feel right until I get another job, though. And I think, this time, I'm going to avoid any place that has cameras and news teams surrounding the place."

"That's fine. You have a lot of skills, Lana. I know you lost the job you've wanted most since you were a kid, but on the plus side, now you can work with animals. You always wanted to work with animals, right?"

Lana scratched her chin, thinking about it. "Being a zookeeper would be cool. The Royal Woods Zoo has a pretty awesome Reptile Room. They have alligators and crocodiles and sea turtles and frogs, even though frogs aren't reptiles so why do they always put them in the damn Reptile Room it makes no sen-"

"Lana, you're ranting."

"Sorry. I'm still not feeling too hot. It's basically taking everything in me to not just grab a tub of ice cream and squat here all day."

Lincoln frowned sympathetically, and opened his arms wide. Lana scooted into his embrace, and the white haired young man hugged her. He kissed her forehead and rubbed her arms and back reassuringly. She knew that no matter what he did, it wasn't going to help her in the long run… but it did feel nice to have someone there for her.

_Maybe, in the end, it was the best call I could've made. Lincoln wouldn't abandon me no matter what happened. He would've have thrown me out because people might start talking._

As much as Lana didn't like it, there was a burning sense of resentment towards Bobbie burning in her heart. It wasn't her fault, Lana knew. All she needed to do was watch just a little bit of the news or a late night talk show or an online clip to know just how vicious and mocking people could get when they saw just one mistake from a public figure. For someone like Bobbie, she would be shredded apart, even if it wasn't something she did. Still, Lana just wanted to know if Bobbie truly ever was her friend, if all those smiles and talks were actually selfless at one point in time…

Lana didn't like feeling spiteful. It didn't suit her.

"Hey," she heard her brother start, "I just want you to know that while you're trying to get back on your feet, you're welcome to stay here with me. I'm sure Clyde wouldn't mind, when he finally gets back from Siberia..."

"Of course I was going to stay here. You didn't have to tell me that. Long distance relationships really don't work for me," she grinned.

"Well, aren't you confident," Lincoln snorted.

"Lincoln, can you honestly imagine a situation in which you'd let me, your adorable little sister/girlfriend whose down on her luck and out of a job, go anywhere else? I can't. What I can see is the two of us living together, getting closer… maybe one day, there could be a kid~"

"You're unemployed and I'm in college. Now is not a good time to be talking about kids."

"I wasn't talking about now. But maybe someday..."

"B-But what about deformities? Wouldn't the kid have problems? And even if they are healthy, we'd have to take care of another person in this economy and then there's crime and drugs and maybe they'll bring back the draft..."

"Lincoln, I'm joking. Calm down," Lana laughed, slapping him lightly on his cheek. "You're such a spaz. No wonder people call you Lame-O."

"Only Ronnie Anne ever called me that."

"We all did. Behind your back."

"Yeah, okay, I'm going to go get breakfast now," Lincoln said, an unamused scowl drawn on his face. He shot out of bed and left the still laughing Lana behind, closing the door behind him. He did smile, though, when he was out of her line of sight. It was going to be a while before she truly got over losing her dream job, but at least she was on a good start.

_And it's all thanks to you, Mr. Casanova man._

"I didn't do much," Lincoln argued with the thought dismissively. "She's a strong person by nature, she'd have bounced back eventually. It would be cool if she decided to become a zookeeper, too. Free tickets to the zoo sounds nice. Or would I only get a discount? Never mind that, I need to think about breakfast. Waffles sound good. Blueberry waffles with a bit of syrup… yeah, that's good stuff..."

He then paused, reflected on himself for a moment, and then sighed. "You know, when I say all my thoughts out loud, I sound like a real jackass."

* * *

After breakfast, Lana went out into the backyard to let her other best friend know about everything that's happened. She went to the small pond in the corner, and knelt before it. There was a smile on her face, but that slowly faded as she searched the pond for Seymour and couldn't find him. She picked up the lily pads and lifted them out of the water, to find that the amphibian wasn't swimming or hiding beneath them. "Where is that frog?"

Then she saw something leap out of the grass, out of the corner of her eye, and out of sheer instinct she fell to the side. She lifted her arm to defend herself against the projectile, but when she felt something slimy tap on her arm, she knew what it was. "Seymour," Lana scolded the frog with a laugh, as Seymour struggled to latch onto her arm. Lana straightened her arm into a line, and she rubbed Seymour's head with her finger. "And where were you just now? You shouldn't leave the pond, you know. There's a raccoon out there somewhere, ready to gobble you up if he sees ya."

A loud croak from the frog was his only response.

"Well, I hope you had fun outside the pond, at least," she said. "My last few days haven't been the most fun."

Seymour cast her a sympathetic look, to the best of his ability, and Lana laughed lightly. "Okay, it hasn't been all that bad. There's been good news and bad news. Which one sounds better to say first?"

The green frog blinked, and Lana interpreted that as him wanting to hear the bad news first. Sadistic little thing.

"Well, there's this woman I work with… worked with, named Bobbie Fletcher. We made a great team, and I thought we were close friends. But then she found out a big secret about me, and we had to break it off. Our career together and our friendship."

Lana sighed miserably, and her pet let out a sad, slow croak. "It's mostly my fault. I got all impulsive and got myself in trouble. But I can't help it! It's just who I am. And you know what, if she and all of sports media can't handle who I am, then I don't need them, and they don't deserve me."

She said that with a brave air of confidence, but there was still one little lingering thought that seemed to bother her. _Before I left, Bobbie told me that she loved me. That she wanted me to be with her instead of Linc. How long has she had those feelings? And… if she really wanted us to start dating, then can I really take everything she said to me before that seriously?_

Lana shook her head, as if it shake off the thought. _No, she wouldn't do that. I know Bobbie well enough to know she isn't that selfish._

"Anyways, that's enough of the downer talk. There's some good to come out of this. I mean, until I find another job, every day is like 24/7 hours of free time. It's like summer vacation, but maybe longer. So that means I can spend more time with you, little buddy."

Seymour chirped with happiness. He didn't understand anything Lana was saying, but as long as he saw a smile on the face of the young lady that was nice to him, he knew it was a good thing. He somewhat suspected she'd be able to spend more time near the pond, which was also good news for him. More treats and rubs for him.

"And that also means I get to spend some more time with Lincoln," Lana said, looking back at the house. "I made my choice, he was my choice, so I'm going to make the most out of it. Problem is, I kinda don't know _how _to make the most of it, if you get what I mean. What do you think I should do?"

Seymour ribbited.

"What? Hell no, I'm not asking my sisters for guy advice. Even I don't tell them that it's Lincoln, guy talk is lame. Especially with Lori, she gets way too overexcited."

Another ribbit.

"I guess that makes sense. I know I made the right choice going with Linc, so if something's meant to happen, it will. Still… there has to be something I could do..."

Lana's eye wandered back to the house, to one of the open windows. It was the kitchen window. A few plates were visible to her, and there was the faintest smell of fruit and pastries floating out of the window. The breeze carried it in her direction, and she took a nice whiff of it, smiling. It smelled really good…

And that's when the idea struck her.

"Seymour! That's it!" she exclaimed with excitement. "I know what I can do for Linc. And, as a bonus, it'll take my mind of Bobbie and everything else for a while."

Lana was so enthusiastic about her idea that she tossed Seymour back into the pond and quickly rushed towards the house, kicking up dirt all across the lawn. The frog swam back to the top, croaking in the most annoyed tone a frog could muster, before it hopped onto the stone slabs that surrounded the makeshift pond. He was tempted to follow Lana back into the house, and see what it was like inside for once, but he decided against it. Whatever his mistress was planning, it seemed like something that would easily backfire.

Plus, there might be cats inside. Humans loved cats, cats loved to eat frogs, and Seymour did not want to risk it.

He did notice a few minutes later when the young blonde pushed her older brother out of the house, and into the car. She was screaming something Seymour couldn't hear, aside from brief phrases like 'one of a kind' and 'strong handle'. The man seemed to roll his eyes, but eventually got in the car and started it, lights activating and machinery humming, and drove it down the lane and down the road. Lana watched until his car disappeared from sight, before she grinned to herself, and rubbed her hands together with Machiavellian glee.

"That'll keep him busy for the afternoon. Now to make myself busy while he's out buying that plunger."

She went inside, waltzed straight into the kitchen, and pulled out a long kitchen knife. "Damn, this thing looks like a machete," Lana commented. She swung it in the air, as if she were a curious militia fighter, before throwing it down on the counter and scratching her mud-crusted cheek. "Alright, time to pull out the scraps of girly girl I have in my body and cook some good dinner for my bro. I can do this. I've made food for my pets before. What could possibly go wrong?"

* * *

"I can't do anything right."

Lana was curled up on the couch, seemingly more miserable than ever. Lincoln cleaned the counter with a sponge, wiping it clean of all the ash and splatters, before throwing a garbage bag's worth of ruined food away. Lincoln hated throwing food away, as Clyde's dads had made him painfully aware of how much food waste could go to hungry people, but he justified it to himself by telling himself that if a homeless kid ate what he was tossing out, they'd probably die.

He chuckled nervously, trying to think of something reassuring to say to Lana, but honestly, what could he say? She really did make a mess of the kitchen. That wouldn't be out of the ordinary if it weren't for the fact that she wasn't trying to make a mess this time. There was flour spilled over the oven, jelly stuck to the ceiling, and a large cucumber sitting in the middle of two slabs of ground beef on the table, pointed directly at him as if to mock him. At some point Lana must've realized what she was doing, because the young woman's clothes were painted with food way too deliberately to be a random mistake. Of course she wasn't bothered by that, but Lincoln was bothered by how she lay on the couch, rubbing the entire food pyramid into the fabric.

_Worry about that later. Just let her know it's alright. She tried to do something nice for you, you owe her that much at least._

"I-It's no big deal," Lincoln said. "I'll just order us something to eat and throw all this out. Hell, maybe the raccoon will like it."

"He won't. Because I suck all everything," Lana growled. "I suck at keeping a secret, I suck at cooking, I suck at trying to be a good partner..."

"Lana, for the last time, I'm not expecting you to put on dresses and make me dinners and stuff like that. If I wanted that, I'd ask around for Cristina's number and give her a call. I like you for who you are, so you don't need to change that."

"But what if I do? Let's say I was a bit more shy and girly. Would I have grabbed you in public and started kissing you and then gotten in trouble with Bobbie?"

"Would you have ever even gotten to know Bobbie if you were like that? Would you have ever looked at a race track, let alone work at one?" Lincoln responded.

"Guess not."

"So the takeaway is that you're fine the way you are. Plus, cooking isn't even girly. You ever seen Gordon Ramsey? That guy would shred me apart for every deviled egg I've ever made in my life."

Lana chuckled, thinking their conversation was done, when Lincoln walked over to her and sat by her side. He placed a careful hand on her shoulder, and squeezed lightly. The brother and sister looked into each other's eyes, and in there their emotions were revealed. Sparks of worry, doubt, concern, fear, sadness, and passion flew between their chromatic eyes, and they told stories that words couldn't ever hope to express.

She just needed to know if she was right. She didn't need any advice or apology. All Lana really wanted and needed was for someone to tell her if choosing Lincoln was the right choice.

"I want to know… what do you think, Lana? Do you think you made the right choice?"

"I was kinda hoping someone else could tell me if I did."

Lincoln sighed, trying to put what he wanted to say into words. "We all do, Lana. We all do. We all wish we had some all-knowing friend hanging over our shoulders and telling us the exact right thing to do, and telling us if what we've already done was good or bad. But there isn't a person alive who can be like that, especially not me. The truth is that now that you're grown-up, you have to decide for yourself if you're happy with what you've chosen."

He then kissed her, and smiled. "But if it helps, I'm flattered that you chose me."

"It's when you say stuff like this that I really realize that I did make the right choice. You know me better than I know myself, Linc," Lana smiled in turn. "Thanks a lot. I really needed to hear that."

"No problem, Lana."

The eighteen year old sat up straight, and looked down at her clothes and skin. "I can't really tell, but… are my clothes dirtier than usual?"

Lincoln pointed at a brown stain, and Lana frowned. "Isn't that a mud stain? That's always been there."

"I think it's fudge."

Lana scraped it with her finger, and put that finger in her mouth, tasting it. "Yeah, that's fudge."

"I have to ask… what were you planning on making with fudge, noodles, cucumber, banana, toast, tomato, blue cheese and an old piece of mutton?"

"Doesn't matter. What matters is that I need to take a shower," she said. She lifted herself from the couch, and slowly turned towards the stairs. She took a few steps up, then paused with her foot hanging over one of the stairs. Lincoln looked up, and the young woman turned her head to look at her brother over her shoulder.

Her eyes were wide, and her voice seemed timid and choked when she mumbled "So… you coming?"

* * *

With a flick of her wrist, the shower turned on. Hot water rained down into the tub as Lana sat on the edge of the tub, gracefully cupping her hand and placing it under the water to test. "F-Feels warm," she said, quickly drawing her hand back and shaking off the heat.

"You know, this is the second time we've showered together this week," Lincoln muttered.

"It's how I motivate myself to do it."

"Okay, maybe the hating showers thing was okay when you were a kid, but honestly, grow up."

Lana smirked at Lincoln. "Maybe I just need to be taught to love showers. Maybe I need someone to… make me love them."

It was a distraction, really. Just another distraction for Lana. But it didn't matter to her. With every piece of clothing she removed, it felt like the weight of her failures was lifted with them. With every smudge and stain washed away by the hot water of the shower, it felt like another of her worries were swept down the drain. And when Lincoln finally relented, took off his own clothes, and got in the shower with her, her sight and smell was filled with her brother. Everything else seemed meaningless and useless; at that moment, there was nothing but him and her, underneath the warm waterfall.

"So… you gonna make me love showers?" she asked teasingly.

"I don't know. Are you?" he whispered huskily, before leaning in for a kiss. He pushed her up against the wall, and the two began tasting each other's mouths. Their tongues wrestled for control, wrapping around each other and swapping saliva. Her hand dangled by her side, until it brushed against something hot and hard around his groin…

She grinned, knowing her plan of attack.

When their mouths separated, Lana grabbed his cock and started twisting it around. "Ow, ow, ow, Lana," he complained, but Lana's Cheshire grin only elongated. She twisted it one last time, so hard that his dick nearly spun a 180, but she let his manhood go. It bounced a few times as Lana laughed. "You're cruel," Lincoln said.

"You're fun to mess with," she responded.

"You're mean."

"You're adorable."

He smirked and lifted his hand, placing it directly under her chin. He lifted her face ever-so slightly, and Lana felt a hot red blush bloom on her face. "You're really beautiful, Lana," he whispered.

"L-Linc..."

Lincoln stared into her eyes and brought his lips to hers again, though this time he was more gentle. His palms reached for her back and hips, and began caressing and cradling her skin against his as he hugged her tightly, his cock grinding on her wet stomach. She shivered and cried out as the young man gave her a tender flick by her womanhood, making her even more aroused.

_Oh, Lincoln! __Lana_ thought as the kiss deepened, his tongue sweeping into her mouth and almost aggressively dominating her flailing tongue. before he pulled it back to smile gently at her. "I love you, Lana," he said to her.

"Did I grab your dick too hard? It's like a pulled a lever and now you're getting all fuzzy and stuff."

Lincoln rolled his eyes. "Just roll with it, Lana. I can't feel good about this until I reach a certain Girl Guru-romance threshold."

"Fine, fine..."

Lincoln stared into her viridescent eyes, his hand weaving its way though her dirty blonde hair, occasionally scraping against her naked shoulders in a soft pseudo-massage. He licked his lips and bent slightly to press his mouth against her neck, kissing her soft skin delicately. Lincoln then removed his fingers from her hair and brought them to her chest. He ran his hands gently over Lana's flawless orbs. Her nipples, already hard from arousal and passion, only hardened some more. Water dripped down to them, and from Lincoln's view, it almost looked like she was lactating her feminine milk.

_She really is amazing._

His hands snaked down her trim and athletic form, only to be stopped by Lana's own hands. She clasped her fingers around them, gasping heavily. When he heard her panting, he wasn't sure if it was from arousal or worry, so he naturally asked "Everything alright, Lana? You seem a little distressed."

"I'm fine, and believe me, your hands feel amazing. But I'm tired of just receiving. I want to be active too. With that in mind..."

She revealed her shark-like teeth in a lustful grin as she got down on her knees. The flow of water rushed underneath her kneecaps, and it warmed Lana to her core. She shivered, before she quickly brought her face forward to kiss her brother's inner thighs and gently found her way down to shaft. "Hey, Lincoln's penis!" she greeted it uncouthly. "I think I might've hurt you a bit earlier. Here, let me _kiss _it better..."

She snorted, and then spit on his dick.

"Gross, Lana! What the hell do you think you're doi-"

Lincoln gasped sharply as her mouth wrapped around his burning length. She took him in, inch by inch, and his cock pulsated inside. It throbbed against Lana's tongue, which was trying to identify the taste of her brother's flesh. Was it sweet or salty or bitter? She couldn't decide, but all she knew is that she wanted more of it. She pulled back, spitting out his dick and rolling her tongue, but that was only for a second as she regained herself.

He groaned as she licked his sensitive head, before dipping his penis in her mouth again. This time she didn't spit out, instead carefully positioning her hands on his hips and legs to help with her planned fellatio. She started slowly, licking and kissing his length while the young man moaned "Fuck, Lana!" in hushed breaths. The smell of pheromones mixed with the hot, misty air of the shower, and Lana reached peak arousal. She began to lap at the drops of pre-cum that oozed from his slit, licking at the testes and bottom of the penis before sliding her wet tongue across the shaft to his crown.

Within seconds, Lincoln found himself losing his composure. His knees buckled with every lick, and his hands began to grip at her hair, almost violently, as she continued with the blowjob. Their bodies were both sweaty and musky, and every time Lana tried sloppily bobbing her head along his junk, his fluids would dribble down to her chin and chest. They were both pretty sure they'd be leaving the shower dirtier than when they came in, but that just opened the possibility of taking another bath. Maybe one where Lincoln would return the favor~

After many minutes of the younger lover pleasuring him orally, Lincoln bit down on his lip with a sharp hiss. "I think I'm starting to feel it," he said.

That, to Lana's ears, meant go faster.

So she did, and Lincoln moaned even louder. It echoed off the closed bathroom space, and it managed to drown out the loud sounds of Lana's suckling. Lincoln's own hips were rocking back in forth now, so desperate for the release that was agonizingly building up inside him. With every thrust, he hit the back of her throat, and Lana's eyes teared at the feeling. She needed to end this quick, with a grand finale, with took the form of her grabbing her brother's ballsack and twisting it like she did to his dick before.

His orgasm hit, reverberating through his entire body as Lincoln let out a loud cry of "Fuck, I'm cumming!" His dick began to caulk up loads of semen, and he sprayed it into her mouth and down her gullet. Lana, for her part, swallowed what she was given gracefully, a blushing and blissful look on her face to match the one on her brother's. She felt rope after rope spew inside, and Lana's giney began to tingle at the feeling.

He backed up and fell against the wall, glancing down to the erotic sight of a panting, sweaty, naked Lana, still doing her best to drink her brother's milk. Her eyes fluttered with every second, batting at him with horny intent, and it was only then that Lincoln really noticed how long her eyelashes were. A small feminine feature on her tomboyish visage.

"You know, we can stop, if you're too tired to continue," he said to her. "I won't take this any farther than you want me to."

Lana stared at him with love and adoration sparkling in her eyes. She could see that Lincoln, at the end of the day, would always be the same. He could feign selfishness and pride, but he still cared deeply for the people around him. He cared deeply for _her. _To him, it wasn't important that he gets what we wants; it was more important that they were equal in this weird, bizarre, taboo, twisted, sinful, wonderful romance they had created together through a series of beautiful accidents. She reached up and gently caressed his freckled cheek, then whispered softly into his delicate ear,

"Lincoln, stop being a bitch and let me have this."

He laughed loudly. "Remind me to wash your mouth out before we get out of the bath."

She then grabbed his and kissed him, dragging his swollen member to her sheath. The two naked bodies stood side by side as more heated water rained on them, her calloused hands wrapped tightly around his body, just as his softer hands wormed around her body. Nails dug into skin, moans and groans floated into the air, and finally, with a nod from her brother, Lana sunk his length into her thin opening.

"Oh shit! Lincoln!" she cried out as his girth stretched out her walls. To Lincoln, it felt like he had plunged his dick into a very soft compressor. He knew she was tight, but he didn't imagine she would be even tighter than before. Her arms and legs wrapped tightly around him, squeezing him like her grabby walls squeezed his erection. It was clear that it was still a bit painful, but at the same time, Lana gave no sign that she wanted him to pull out. As with before, pleasure and pain mingled together, and Lana knew the bliss at the end would be worth it. Lincoln smiled gently, cradling his little sister.

"Here goes, Lana..."

His hips flexed backwards and forwards as he pulled his hefty cock back and thrust into her again, over and over. He started out in a sloppy and unorganized series of pushes and pulls, but he quickly found his rhythm, aided by her moans and the friction of their genitals. When he looked to her again, the discomfort and hurt had vanished from her face, and what was left was desire. She grabbed his head by its side and slammed her mouth into his, her tongue darting upwards and grappled with his. His dick throbbed inside her, getting even weightier, and the thrusts only grew more labored and intense.

_Don't stop, Linc. Just don't stop! _

She then shifted herself, pressing her chest against the wall and allowing Lincoln to grabbed her by her hips and begin rutting into her pussy from behind. His flesh smacked into her's, and her skin rippled. He was getting faster now, fucking her with the single-minded determination and ferociousness of a beast.

At that moment, Lincoln thought about not just them, but everyone else. He had been with a few girls over the years, like Stella, and he had encountered many other attractive crushes, like Paige or Cristina. But it was Lana, his own flesh and blood, who had won out over them all. It was more than physical with her. It had to be, considering her skin was often stained with muck and her hair sometimes smelled like a gas station. It was the connection and support they had for each other. Her brave daring to chose love in the face of a merciless world that had already started to punish her for doing so. Lincoln knew he couldn't do much for her in his current state, and so he felt obligated to at least let her feel how much he loved her.

Because she was the most important thing in the world to him. And he hoped she felt the same.

Lana's excited moaning brought him back to reality. The sheath around his manhood began to tighten, and Lincoln lifted his leg off the ground to make it easier for him to slide in and out, still gripping the blonde's nubile body.

The two continued their love-making for a very long time. Neither was sure how long, but the hot water in the shower had cooled now, and the only thing that kept them warm against the onslaught of frigid shower water was each other. It was a bit of a relief when their orgasms finally hit them, and Lincoln cried "Lana!" as his dick exploded stringy ropes of hot seed into her body.

"Lincoln!" she screamed out in return, the feeling of being filled with heat forcing her into the most pleasurable orgasm of her young life. Her toes curled and her hips bucked against the still spraying boy, and her scratched against the wall as she rode out her climax with her older lover.

At the end of it, Lincoln feebly reached to close the shower, and the water stopped. The two were too fatigued to even leave the tub, so they fell to the ground, their naked asses presses against the bottom of the tub, water still flowing through under them. Their shoulders rubbed against each other, and Lana looked up at her brother with a beam. "Did it feel good?"

"Yeah. Yeah."

"As weird it is to say… I think this just showed me that everything's going to be alright. Things will be fine. I know they will, because I got you."

Lincoln was too tired to respond, so he just gave her an appreciative smile through his panting. Lana gave him a light punch on his arm as a response. She lay her back against the wall as well, taking a few moments to think about what came next, before a sly little grin grew on her face.

"Hey, did the water under us just get a little hotter? And now it's kinda colder… OH MY GOD, LANA, THAT'S SO GROSS!"

"Good thing we're still in the bath," Lana laughed as she turned the valve to turn the shower on again. The two actually bathed that time, scrubbing and cleaning themselves off. When they finished, they put on their robes and went to bed together. They stared into each other's eyes, exchanging light smiles and fluffy gazes, before sleep finally got the better of them.

"G-Good night, Lana," Lincoln yawned as he closed his eyes.

"Good night, Lincoln. I love you," she said.

Yep. Things were going to be a-okay.

* * *

**If anyone thinks that last joke was gross, I'd like to tell you that that was the tamest one I could've ended on.**

**Anyways, thanks for reading everyone. This chapter is the official "end" of the story, but there is one more bonus chapter I'm thinking about doing. I'll get around to it at some point... maybe. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Here it is; the promised last chapter of this story. Unlike the other chapters, this one won't form a cohesive narrative. It's made up of three parts. One is comedic, one is romantic, and one is kinda gross...or hot, depending on your tastes (Don't worry, it ain't too out there)**

* * *

**1\. Doppelganger **

Lincoln raised his wrist to check the time on his ticking watch again. The hour hand was on the 'III' while the minute hand was slowly drifting towards the top of the watch. It was almost three o'clock, which only meant one thing.

Clyde was almost here.

He turned to Lana, sitting on the couch with an unassuming look on her face. She was clearly bored, as she rocked back and forth on the cushion like an ADHD-ridden child in the principal's office. "Come on, Lincoln, you said he would be here half an hour ago," she complained.

"I also told you that flights get delayed a lot, didn't I?"

"I'm booooooored."

"Lana, I hate to pull this card, but you're an adult now," he said like a responsible older brother (which, at this point, he was anything but), "so you gotta learn how to be patient and sit still."

"Being an adult sucks monkey balls."

Lincoln sighed. She wasn't wrong.

"Why aren't we at the airport anyway?" Lana asked. "Seems to me like we should be there to pick him and his gal pal up and bring them home."

"I offered, but he insisted that he could take a cab," Lincoln said with a shrug, before his face went back to stern mode. He waggled his finger in front of her face. "And Lana… I hope you'll remember our little agreement?"

"About what?"

"About… us."

"Oh, right. Gotcha."

Lincoln was worried that she was just saying that without meaning it. The two of them had had the house together for so long that it almost seemed natural for them to kiss and hug and do worse in the living room. A young couple left alone for the first few days of their relationship will naturally take each and every chance they can to have sex, and no room was safe. They had fucked in the living room, they had fucked in the boiler room… one time Lincoln had snuck up on Lana as she was cooking some bacon, and bent her over the counter and thrust himself into her vagina. He humped her for a few minutes, the sound of sizzling bacon drowned out by Lana's moans, until he finally came inside her with a roar.

He blushed, but also cringed. Lana might have been used to thinking that the entire home was a safe space for their forbidden romance, but with Clyde and his Slavic girl around, that would no longer be the case. Lincoln could only hope she would keep that in mind. The last thing they needed was another kiss-in-the-parking-lot scenario.

He heard a car rolling up to their home, and looked out the window. He watched as a tall dark-skinned man with glasses stepped out of the passenger seat, and Lincoln grinned. "Alright, Lana, they're here," he said excitedly. Lana had to bite back a laugh. He seemed like a giddy eleven year old excited for a sleepover.

There was a swift knocking on the door, and the Loud siblings opened it. Clyde walked in, dragging a violet suitcase in with him. It looked really heavy, judging from the veins bulging on his hand and the strained look on his face.

"Lincoln!" Clyde offered his friend his swollen hand, and Lincoln, rather than shaking it, slapped their palms together in a high five. Then they fistbumped, then they played a game of rock-paper-scissors, then they looked their fingers together and wiggled them, then Clyde made a circle with his hand that Lincoln gladly dipped his middle finger into. Following this, the two snickered. Grown-ups or not, obscene gestures would always amuse them.

"Hey Clyde," Lana greeted. Clyde turned to look at the blonde, and his eyes widened.

"Whoa, Lana… you've grown!"

"Yeah, people tend to do that as the years pass," she said. The two shook hands, and Lana was pleased to see that he didn't immediately wipe his hands with a wet wipe this time. "So how was Russia? And where's the lucky lady?"

"Oh right, you two haven't met her yet. She's a beautiful girl, you two will love her. Not as much as I do, though."

He heaved a heavy sigh, and batted his eyelashes.

He then stepped to the side, and a shadow fell on the door. Lincoln and Lana heard the sound of high heels clacking towards the door, and they both watched as Clyde's girlfriend walked into the house…

The girl looked at them, and raised her hand in greeting. Something about her seemed familiar, Lana thought. She had white hair… freckles on her cheeks… she was wearing an orange shirt with blue pants… there was a little rabbit toy on her luggage…

"Lincoln, Lana," Clyde said in an announcer's deep voice, "I'd like you two to meet Linka."

_Linka._

_Linka._

_Linka._

That's when it hit Lana.

_OMG Clyde is so gay for Lincoln that he started dating his female version. Fucking LMAO!_

She wanted to burst out laughing, so she bit down on her bottom lip, trying to force it down.

"Um… hi, L-Linka. It's nice to meet you," Lincoln said.

"L-Likewise," Linka said with a slight Eastern European accent. It was clear from the way they were looking at each other that the similarities were not lost on them. Lincoln raised a flat hand, and Linka did so at the same time. They titled their heads and moved their hands in unison. It was like looking at a genderbent mirror.

Finally, Linka looked at her boyfriend. "Um… may I take my things to my new room?" she asked politely.

"Sure thing. Up the stairs and on your right."

She gave Lincoln one last weird look, before going up the stairs. The wheels of the suitcase hit every step as she went up, and Lincoln cringed. _That's going to leave marks, _he thought. He looked back at his friend, who grinned at him. "Ain't she a catch?" he said in a low, almost husky voice.

Lincoln didn't answer right away. Instead, he titled his head to look at Lana, and when she nodded at him, he knew he wasn't just imagining things. He turned back to Clyde and let out a slow breath. "Y-Yeah," he said, "she, um… kinda reminds me of someone. Someone really close to you. Uh, someone who may or may not be standing in this room."

Clyde didn't seem to be following, so Lincoln grabbed a fistful of his pallid hair. "She has white hair. You know, that's pretty rare."

"I don't get what you're getting at."

"You're dating female Lincoln, Clyde," Lana told him bluntly. Lincoln hissed at his sister, but she shrugged and said, "What? I'm not going to stand here all day and watch as you pussyfoot around it."

"That's ridiculous," snapped Clyde. "Just because she has white hair and freckles on her cheeks and she wears the same clothes as you and has a really similar name and comes from a big family of siblings with the opposite sex and likes bunny rabbits… uhh..."

Lincoln hated to do him like that, but he had to nod at him. _See, I told you so, _his faint smirk said.

Clyde turned away from the two, clutching his head. He felt his hands slide down the side of his face, and he felt his chest start to heave and push as his large lungs prepared for a crisis of faith attack. He calmed himself by reciting the alphabet backwards, and then turned back to face Lana and Lincoln. "Okay, maybe I'm dating Girl Lincoln, but so what? That isn't as weird as you two."

Lincoln flinched. Did he know?

"Yes, I know," Clyde said, as if he could read his friend's mind. "I know the smell of incest anywhere. I'm like Chris Hansen, but with brother-sister couples instead. And you two are clearly doing it. No wonder you're family is so huge."

There was a faint thud as Lincoln fell into the couch. He needed to sit down.

_Well, at least I won't have to worry about the secret getting out…_

* * *

**2\. "Next time, though, we're doing it my way."**

Lana wasn't exactly a slut, but she did like sex. Every time she and Lincoln consummated their love, she felt a rush like no other. Nothing – not mud or grease or garbage – gave her the same amazing feeling as bouncing on Lincoln's boner until her slit exploded with vaginal fluid. Her eyes would roll, her toes would curl, and she would feel something akin to volts of electricity charge her body with the highest pleasure.

And sure, part of it had to do with the fact that it was Lincoln, and she loved her older brother deeply on some spiritual level or whatever...

But part of it was just the raw, physical act of fucking like animals.

But Lana knew, from reading woman's magazines (she got them for Lola, honestly!) that sex could get stale if it's the same over and over. Lana didn't understand how something as awesome as sex could get stale, but she figured the people who wrote those articles knew more than she did. So what was the solution? Try new things, of course!

And Lana knew just the thing to try.

It was just a matter of getting around to actually asking him. She wondered how he would take it.

One day, she found him alone on the couch, watching the Jurassic Park/Blarney the Dinosaur crossover (Hollywood, amirite?). Clyde and Linka were out of the house, so Lana grinned like a naughty little cat. This was the perfect opportunity to try it out.

"Hey Lincoln… can you _come_ with me to the bathroom?" Lana asked, leaning on the frame of the door. Her breasts squished against the wood, and her eyes were half-lidded as she stared blankly at her towheaded brother. Lincoln was looking back at her now, and the reddening on his face told Lana all she needed to know.

"Okay," he said dumbly.

Lana led him to the bathroom, and she stepped into the bathtub. She beckoned for Lincoln to join her with finger. She felt extra minxy today, so she let her pink tongue flick out of her mouth to lick her bottom lip.

Now that they were both in the shower together, they both stripped down to their naked forms. Lana got down on her knees, her long eyelashes in a flutter as she batted her eyes at him. She took his flaccid penis in her hand, and began to stroke it slowly. When Lincoln moaned, she gave him her proposal.

"Listen, Linc, I wanna try something new with you, okay? It might seem a little gross, and it might take a while, but… I think it'll be really hot."

Already he was nervous. If even Lana could admit that it was gonna be gross, then he couldn't imagine what she was planning. "What is it?" he asked, his voice reserved and cautious.

She grinned, and told him what she had in mind.

Lincoln sighed at the end. It did sound a little grody, but hey, it's what Lana wants (haha, geddit? It's a reference!)

She let go of his dick, and Lincoln turned around to the medicine cabinet above the sink. He opened it up, reached in, and pulled out a tub of petroleum jelly. He rubbed it on his palm, and got to work… on himself.

He began to stroke himself, and Lana watched eagerly as his organ got redder and redder, bigger and bigger. Soon, it was making wet noises, and Lincoln was biting down on his lip. Lana didn't know what he was imagining while he masturbated, but she liked to think he was thinking of her.

His breaths became ragged, and his face went slack. He start to squat, which brought to mind the image of a caveman. A really handsome caveman. His speed began to increase as his dick throbbed, and Lana knew he was getting close. She raised herself upwards, getting closer to the smelly head of his penis…

He gasped as the first volley of semen burst from his cock.

It smacked Lana in the face, unfortunately hitting her in the eye. Her eye was stuck closed as white goo coated her long eyelashes and kept them shut. Lincoln almost apologized, but Lana begged him to keep going.

"But Lana-"

"Lincoln… drown me in cum like a pornstar," she said, a thin line of jizz sliding down her cheek.

Okay, that sounded kinda hot.

He kept going at it, not pausing to take a break. He couldn't stop: his sister-lover demanded his seed. The bathroom was filled with the noise of Lincoln sloppily jerking himself off, and Lana felt immense need to take his burning wood in her hand – or mouth – and help him out. But no, he needed to do this himself. And judging from the way his face screwed up, he didn't seem to mind.

He came again, this time hitting her on her chin.

And again on her chest.

And twice on her shoulders.

Lincoln seemed like he was going to dehydrate, and his toes would've fallen off if he kept curling them the way he did, so Lana ordered him to stop. She had enough anyways. She knew that if she had looked into a mirror, she would've found her entire face and upper body coated in thick, hot sperm.

He wanted to fall against the tub, but he knew he had a second part of his job to do.

"Alright, Lincoln… _wash it off_," she said evilly.

"This is so bad," he said to himself.

It took him a moment, but soon a hot stream of yellow piss poured out of his dick like a pitcher. Lana felt it spray her like a hose, washing off all the semen. She really, really, really wanted to open her mouth and sample him, but she didn't want to gross him out any furthe-

Just kidding. She opened her mouth, and sprinkles of it hit her tongue.

When he finished, he fell down on his butt, panting heavily. Lana leaned over and took him in her mouth, sucking and licking up any fluid – piss or cum – that remained on him. Her blowjob was sloppy, but it gave Lincoln some sense of relief.

When she was finally done, she looked up at him with innocent wide eyes. "You did better than I thought," she said. "And you taste really good."

"I… don't… think… I'll… be… able… to… have… sex… for… a… while..."

"You did good, bro," Lana said affectionately, patting her brother's body with tender care. "You did good."

* * *

**3\. Happy Birthday, Lola!**

"Happy Birthday, Lola!"

"You guys," Lola said in a fond voice, "you shouldn't have."

"Nonsense!" declared Lincoln.

"You're right. I deserve so much more than this."

It was Lola's – and therefore, by extension, Lana's – birthday, and the twins had a custom to never be away from each other on their special day. No matter what happened, the two of them would meet up on the anniversary of their birth and exchange gifts. The two of them liked to have all their other siblings with them, but given circumstances, they were okay with having only one around. It wasn't like their sisters had forgotten, either; Lynn had sent them a voice message wishing them a good one, and both Lisa and Lily pooled their money to buy a gift that they promised was coming in the mail soon.

But at the end of the day, there were only three around the table. Lola was visiting for only a day or two before she needed to get back to her important job as a fashion blogger on swiftypic.

The cake was divided in half, between flavors. One half was a brown and fudgy chocolate; the other a pink strawberry. Lola and Lana each took their sides, and inhaled their slices of cake. Lincoln was fine with a donut he picked up when he was getting the cake.

"Come on, Linky, have some," Lola insisted, lifting a forkful of fruity cake. She gave a warm smile while she offered her food, with just the faintest hints of red blush on her cheeks. Lincoln remembered Lana's words from all those months ago… about how Lola had feelings for him.

He felt guilty for not noticing before. But now, if Lola still had feelings for him, he would have a hard time not noticing. Lola had grown into a fine young woman – her golden hair was long and properly combed, and it sometimes washed over her pink cheeks and striking blue eyes. His eyes looked down at her hands, perfectly soft, with ten well-manicured and painted fingernails. Her breasts were the same size as Lana's, but her butt… it was a perfectly heart-shaped pillow.

Was it a bad thing that he was admiring Lola so much? She was basically Lana but cleaner, so it wasn't really like comparing the two… right?

"Linky, have some." Her voice was sterner now.

He chuckled and opened his mouth, and let the younger twin feed him. The taste of fruit and sugar overwhelmed his senses, and it tasted like what Lola's perfume smelled like.

She smiled at her brother when he seemed to like the cake, and looked back at Lana, busily shoveling mud pie down her gullet. Lincoln also watched Lana with admiration. Lola was beautiful, yes… but it was his little grease monkey that had stolen his heart first.

"It's time for presents!" Lola declared, reaching under the table and handing her sister a wrapped-up box. Lana's eyes widened and her smile elongated as she accepted it.

"Whoa, Lola… what is it?"

"I can't tell you that."

"Come on. Tell me, tell me, tell me!"

"Just open it."

Ten long nails shredded the wrapping, revealing a blank white box. Lana grabbed it and shook it next to her ear, before she just opened it up. Her face fell slightly when she pulled out a make-up kit. "Oh, great… what I always wanted."

"I _know_!" Lola said, not noticing the sarcasm in Lana's voice. "It's _the_ most expensive kit I found on the market. Almost everything is straight from Paris. It cost me a lot of money, but it's worth it to make my sister feel like the amazing girl she is."

Lana smiled. She couldn't stay mad at her sister. Lola had gone out and spent so much money to give her what was, in her opinion, the best gift she could give someone.

_Ah, what the hell? Maybe I can use it every once in a while…_

"Thanks, Lols," the tomboy said, grabbing her sister and giving her a warm hug. Lincoln felt like wiping a little tear from his eye.

Lola returned the hug, and when the twins separated, Lana gave Lola a wicked grin. "And don't think I forgot either… I got you the perfect gift."

Lola's eyes widened. "Ooh, what is it?"

Lana looked over to Lincoln, and nodded at him. Lincoln returned the nod, and Lana said, "Follow Lincoln to his bedroom. I think I left it in his safe by accident."

"His b-bedroom? O-Okay..."

Lana watched her siblings disappear together, and she exhaled. Lincoln would take care of everything… and her, mostly. Lana knew that, no matter how much Lola didn't want to admit it, her feelings for her big brother hadn't faded yet. She took another forkful of cake, and thought, _Just for today, Lola. You can have him for today. Happy birthday, sis._

In Lincoln's bedroom, Lola looked around for the safe. "Where is it?" she asked her brother. She was well aware that she was in the belly of the beast, and she could smell her brother in every inhale. The smell wasn't too bad for a young man. There was hints of BO, but there were also scents of aftershave and male perfume. It smelled… nice.

Lola's face burned. _Where is this damn safe?_

"There's no safe," Lincoln admitted. "Lana just said that to get you up here."

"She did? Why?"

"Because… I'm your birthday present," he said, somewhat sardonically. He spread his arms and pointed at himself, as if he were a body builder male model instead of a skinny artfag.

"Wh-What do you mean?" Lola asked. She knew what he meant though, and her heart rate quickened.

"Lana told me that you… liked me. So when she was thinking of really good gifts to get you, she decided that a day with the boy you loved was the best think. And before you say 'Oh no it's wrong and gross' let's be honest and admit we know what's going to happen. So let's skip it. You get what I'm saying?"

Lola nodded, though she didn't say a word. She seemed dazed, like she didn't believe any of this was actually happening.

"So, birthday girl… what do you want to do? I'll do whatever. Tea party, walk in the park… on the bed..."

The last word seem to shake Lola back to the real world. She glanced at it, and back at her brother, and back at it, and back at her brother.

Then… she smiled.

A shark-like smile.

"On the bed sounds good."

He sat down on the bed, and Lola undid his pants for him. As she unbuckled his belt, she whispered, "You know, I always had a crush on you. You were such a good brother to me, even though I wasn't the best sister ever."

He chuckled. "I don't know what you're talking about," he whispered back, reaching up to run his fingers through her shimmering blonde hair, "you were an amazing sister. I loved being your coach for pageants, I loved being your butler for tea parties… I loved you."

She blushed, and pulled his jeans down. She could feel it through his boxers; a powerful, radiating heat that smelled of an instinct to breed. She rubbed her fingers on it, tracing his length and girth, and she giggled. "It feels nice."

"It's friendly. It likes you," he joked in a low voice.

A second later, his underwear joined his pants on the floor.

As Lola took off her clothes, Lincoln lay down on his back, and lifted his knees in the air. They were like two rivaling peaks, and in the valley below, a tall tree with a thick trunk sprouted. Lola paused for a moment, and begged of Lincoln to look at her.

He raised his head. She was immensely beautiful. Her skin was shimmering under the orange lights, as if her skin had just been deeply massaged with a coconut lotion. Her scent was that of the tropics. Her hair fell to her lower back, and Lincoln's eyes wandered across her body. Her breasts were firm, her stomach fit and taut, and her vagina dripping with arousal.

"Am I beautiful?" she asked him.

"You are. You're beautiful," he said with a bit of a choke.

Lola smiled, as if Lincoln had just told her she had won a million dollars.

She straddled his legs, her palms flat on his kneecaps for support. She faced him, looking into his eyes as she slowly lowered herself onto his girth. When her sensitive lips kissed the head of Lincoln's penis, they both shivered. "Here goes," she said softly.

She lowered herself more, and Lincoln groaned. He could feel it; he was inside her.

Her walls were smooth and well-lubricated, so his penetration was quick. Lola slammed herself on his groin, and she let out a small cry. Tears formed in her eyes, and her lips quivered. Her walls were adjusting to the invader, shifting around and, in the process, massaging the shaft they encircled. Lincoln groaned with pleasure, but he still cared enough about his sister to say, "Don't hurt yourself."

Her heart thumped. He was so caring.

Using his knees as handles, she raised herself, and inch after inch of his meat appeared, now wettened by Lola's folds. When the tip of his dick almost slipped out, Lola slammed herself downwards again, and a wet slapping noise filled the room.

She rose and fell again, and each time she felt her brother's cock scratch against her silky walls. It was like her love for him was a hot stinging itch that only he could drive away. She began to pant as she bounced up and down on his dick, and Lincoln, as if to prove her point, reached upwards and began to stroke her curvy hips. His smile was warm and gentle, and Lola knew that he wouldn't complain if she decided to slow down or speed up. This was for her, and she loved him for it.

Her milky breasts bounced with her, jiggling uncontrollably. They felt weighty on her now, and there was a soreness she couldn't really explain. She let go of one of his kneecaps to touch it, and the sheer sensitivity of it made her cry out as milk squirted from her. It hit Lincoln in the face, and Lola blushed, though she didn't stop grinding herself on his cock. "I'm so sorry," she said.

He seemed surprised, but then his tongue flicked out and tasted the milk. He smacked his lips, and blinked twice. "That's… actually pretty good," he said.

Her blush burned tenfold, but in a pleasant way. "G-Glad you liked it."

His size was massive, Lola just figured. She could feel every ridge and contour and even vein on his shaft. She had played with toys before, experimenting with lubed-up plugs, but never had her walls been so separated before. But it wasn't just his large penis that made Lola's first true sexual encounter magical. It was the fact that it was her brother, someone she had loved for so long from afar. She felt like she had been a castaway on a desert island, and every surge forward was a bite of a juicy turkey.

When she lifted her hips again, she began to move them right to left, churning his cock. Soon it became a dance of up and down, left and right, side and side… and all the way, the two siblings panted together, lost in waves of arousal and lust. Her breaths were getting thinner, and she broke a sweat. She wasn't too accustom med to this much exercise and work on her part, so she felt relived when Lincoln took her hips and began to move her along his length.

"Gosh, it feels so good," she said in a high-pitched whine.

His hips began to rock quickly, and his dick started to slam into her. The sound was akin to plumbing, oddly enough. At that point, Lola threw back her head and let her tongue roll out of her mouth. This was bliss. This was Nirvana. This was heaven and earth and everything in between.

"Oh yes… oh yes… yes, yes, yes, YES!"

She brought his face up to her own, and Lincoln, without pausing, let her kiss him and wrap her tongue around his. If anything that made him go faster and fuck her harder.

It gave her pleasure, in a weird sense, that though she often acted like a haughty and mighty princess, she was now getting handled like a common whore.

Her climax was coming now… she could feel it. She groaned as she felt herself leaking onto his penis, a warning sign of what was too come. "Lincoln..."

"I'm gonna come too," he grunted to her.

And come he did. Lola yelled as she felt him shove himself as deeply as he could inside her. She felt his cock swell and grow, and then it happened: he bucked against her and started to come. His cock filled his little sister with hot liquid, and she groaned as her lower body twitched. Every pump of sperm she received she accepted, like a hummingbird sipping nectar.

Finally, she fell against her brother. Her naked breasts were squashed between them, and she panted as his final spurts flew into her. He reached up to stroke her long hair, and his chest inflated as he heaved a relieved sigh. "I hope I did well for you," he said, kissing her nose.

"I think Lana will have to work really hard next year to get a gift to top this one," Lola giggled.

They cuddled for around half an hour, until it came time to leave. The two sisters hugged, and she leaned on her tippy-toes to kiss her brother's cheek. It seemed almost innocent.

That night, Lincoln went to bed, not expecting to find Lana waiting for him. She was completely naked, and her big butt was facing him. She turned to look at him, and her face was in a pout. "I know I said you should be with Lola as a gift," she said, "but I don't want you to forget who you belong to."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Lincoln told her, reaching down to let the boxers he wore to sleep fall.

The two of them mated all night long.


End file.
